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Plenty of Studs in the Stable

Nov. 29, 2016
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Dear Ruthie,

I’ve been dating a guy for four months. He loves video games, working out and sports. I suck at video games (and have little interest in them), I don’t work out (my bad) and I don’t know a football from a basketball (and have little interest in those kinds of balls anyway).

He berates me often about these things, telling me that I suck at the games, that I’m fat and need to lose weight, that I’m uncoordinated and that I’m dumb.

While it sounds like we have nothing in common, we do have fun together regularly, plus the sex is great and his body is incredible. It’s just these issues that are troublesome. I end up hurt, embarrassed and/or angry. Any advice on how he and I can get past this stuff?

Uncoordinated Guy

Dear Guy,

Do I have any advice? Hell, yes, honey! Get the hell out! Four months is the honeymoon phase—not the “you’re fat” phase! I don’t care if his dick has a red cape wrapped around it or if he’s got sparks flying outta his ass, dump the chump! Good sex isn’t worth verbal abuse!

I’m worried, too, that you don’t seem to realize the importance of your own happiness. No matter how good the good times are, calling you names, upsetting you and embarrassing you are not worth it. You have a history of four lousy months. Pull the plug on this one, sugar. There are plenty of studs in the stable!      


Dec. 1: Hands Up for HIV Prevention at Hillside Terrace Family Resource Center (1452 N. Seventh St.): Be part of this day of education, awareness, giveaways and more by stopping by this event any time between 10 a.m. and 6 p.m. More than a dozen health- and HIV-related organizations gather to offer free HIV testing, information on PREP and news regarding services available to everyone in Milwaukee. Get your health questions answered, discover new resources and learn just how much help is out there. Put your hands up for HIV prevention, honey!

Dec. 1: World’s AIDS Day Commemoration at Holy Rosary Church (2011 N. Oakland Ave.): It’s time to remember and celebrate those we’ve lost to AIDS as well as those who continue to make strides in dealing with the disease. A 6 p.m. reception kicks off the night, followed by a 7:30 interfaith service. The memorable night is free and open to all wishing to celebrate life! 

Dec. 3: Leather Convergence at D.I.X. (739 S. First St.): It’s ass-less chaps a go-go! Wisconsin leather title-holders join forces to raise money for ARCW at this 9 p.m. party. Drag queens, drink specials, raffles and DJ Chomper make for a memorable night of L/L hotness that won’t stop until bar close. 

Dec. 5 & 6: ‘Down Home with the Carpenters’ at Sunset Playhouse (800 Elm Grove Road): The Christmas season has only just begun, but you’ll be feeling on top of the world with this toe-tapping tribute to America’s favorite singing siblings, besides the Jacksons…and the Osmonds…and the Andrews Sisters. (Okay, now I’m dating myself.) If this sticky-sweet best-selling duo carved a soft spot in your heart, you’re in luck!  Check out this musical revue celebrating Karen and Richard Carpenter. Adult tickets are $21 with discounts available for students, seniors and groups. Jingle your bells over to sunsetplayhouse.com for show times and tickets.

Dec. 6: Intersex Support Meeting at Milwaukee LGBT Community Center (1110 N. Market St.): Are you over 18 and struggling with intersex issues? Looking for some new friends or wish to discuss the challenges and issues you face? Join this monthly meeting! Be sure to call Debra T. at 414-292-3061 first, however. This is a free, safe place for intersex individuals, and Debra helps make sure the group remains that way with a quick discussion over the phone. 

Give Ruthie a jingle…er, uhm…an email. Drop her a line at DearRuthie@Shepex.com, and share your problems or tell her about an event she might want to share in this column.


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