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Say Cheese!

Feb. 21, 2017
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Dear Ruthie,

My partner transformed his body by losing weight and working out. He’s looking hot, and he started posting suggestive selfies of himself on Facebook. 

It started with a weightlifting group, where men post photos of their chests, arms, legs and whatnot. It’s a closed group so the photos aren’t out there for everyone to see. He said posting these selfies was motivation for him, and that the guys in the group offered fitness advice. This bothered me, but he’s just shirtless in the photos. The guys “liking” and commenting on the pics live far away, so I’m not worried about them interfering with our marriage. 

Recently, he admitted to posting suggestive shots to other boards such as DILF boards, hairy-guy boards, etc. His privates are covered in these new photos but just barely. He says he’s not cheating, and that the comments make him feel good about himself.

I don’t think he’s hooking up with the men on the boards, but the posting’s make me uncomfortable. Tension is rising. Am I making more out of this than need be?



Dear Snappy,

Sorry, darlin’, but I can’t help unless you send me a few of the photos. No…send me all the photos. Preferably with a canister of coconut oil. (Don’t ask.) In fact, just have your hot hubby swing by my place with the photos. No go? Fine. Be that way.

If you’re having mixed feelings, then there is something wrong. You two need to discuss the issue and agree to a solution before things get worse. Nip that tension in the bud, sugar.

Let your guy know that the situation is bothering you. Explain that you tried to deal with it, but it’s hurting you and causing concern.

Discuss a few options: 1) He stops posting photos to all boards; 2) He continues to post photos that you approve of to the fitness board only; 3) He continues to post photos but only photos you take of him and that you agree can be posted. Explain that you’d like to join these private groups as well.

I think it’s a great idea for you guys to take and post the photos together! It could be sexy and fun, and reading the comments together might lead to even more fun! Try it and let me know how it goes! (And send those friggin’ photos my way!)


Feb. 23-25: Soar: Women’s Empowerment Summit at Holiday Inn Milwaukee Riverfront (4700 N. Port Washington Road): Spread your wings and soar during this second annual salute to female empowerment. Workshops, speakers and networking are plentiful during the delightful expo. Three-day passes start at $189, but see soarwomenempowermentsummit.com for other ticket options and daily schedules.    

Feb. 25: Happy Birthday Dr. Seuss Read-a-Long at Bay View United Methodist Church (2772 S. Kinnickinnic Ave.): Looking for a friendly place to bring your spouse and kids? Check out one of the most open and accepting churches in the city. There’ll be stories and laughter and breakfast galore; bring your costumes and smiles—leave all frowns at the door. At 9 a.m. sharp you’ll find lots of food…bring your daughter, your wife and your cute little dude. Don’t miss the crafts, the stories and more; for just $3 a child, there’s much to explore!

Feb. 26: Jackie Roberts Drag Sale at La Cage (801 S. Second St.): The LGBT community is still grieving the loss of drag icon, Jackie Roberts. Visit this 1 to 5 p.m. sale and own a piece of history yourself. Proceeds benefit Courage MKE. What a lovely way to remember a lovely person! 

Feb. 27: African American Film Series Presents ‘Moonlight’ at UW-Milwaukee Union Cinema (2200 E. Kenwood Blvd.): Take in the movie that’s sweeping the nation during this 12th annual installment of this popular film series. Enjoy a free showing of Moonlight at 7 p.m. followed by a discussion of the film. Call 414-229-3894 to lean more.

Feb. 27: Studio 54 Party at The Point (906 S. Barclay St.): Mondays will never be the same as Milwaukee’s latest hot spot transforms itself into a sin bin with a weekly retro party. Disco the night away during this launch party, featuring ’70s and ’80s tracks and drag performances. Shake your groove thing from 9 p.m. to 2 a.m. 

Want to share an event with Ruthie? Need her advice on a situation? Email DearRuthie@Shepex.com. Be sure to follow her Facebook (Ruthie Keester) and Twitter (@DearRuthie).


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