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Dear Ruthie,
I like being single. Yes! I do! Everyone acts like this is a problem or that there is something wrong with me or that I’m really lonely and don’t want to admit it. I even had a co-worker suggest I suffered from clinical depression. I don’t! I just like being single. I meet my regular fuck buddy and have Grindr hook-ups sometimes which meet my sexual needs. I have a great group of friends (when they’re not bugging me about being single) who meet my social needs, and lots of love from family and friends who support and love me. I’m loving being a happy, gay single man!
I tell them to give it a rest, but they don’t. No one seems to understand that I enjoy my alone time, and that while I’m open to dating, I’m happy with where I am in life right now, and that’s being single. What can I do or say to get them to understand?
Need to Get Them to Get It,
Annoyed Andy
Dear Andrew,
Oh, you poor lonely baby! I want to hug you and hold you and tell you that Mr. Right is just around the corner. Why can’t you open yourself up to love, sugar? You’re such a great guy! Maybe you need to meet my nephew Herman. He’s a lovely man with his own globe-selling business. (Know anyone who needs a globe, btw?) Herman can show you the error of your ways.
Fuuuuuck that, right? Are you happy? Are you setting goals and joyfully working toward them? Are you living a life with passion and kindness? If so, fuck ‘em! You’re succeeding, sugar, and you don’t need a boyfriend to continue that excitement.
Keep doing what you’re doing. If and when you’re ready to settle down with someone special, you will. For now, life your best life, doll face.
As for those who won’t get off your back, simply smile and let them know you’re perfectly happy with life as it is. Don’t get mad or agitated with them because their concerns are coming from a place of love. Think of how loved you are and realize how many people want what’s best for you; just remember that ultimately you’re the only one who knows what’s best for you!
Ruthie’s Social Calendar
October 16—Milwaukee Ghost Walks/The Bloody Third Ward (at various locations): See the popular Third Ward in a whole new light with a 90-minute outdoor walking tour. Discover the area’s haunted history, learn about its paranormal activity and understand the circumstances of how it got its creepy nickname, The Bloody Third Ward. Tours start at 7:30 p.m. and run throughout October. (Masks are required.) See www.americanghostwalks.com for more, including $25 online tickets.
October 17—Taste of Puerto Rico at American Serb Hall (5101 W. Oklahoma Ave.): Enjoy the flavors, sounds and excitement of Puerto Rico during this lively outdoor event. What a delicious change-of-pace way to enjoy autumn! The good times run noon to 8:45 p.m.
October 17—Fall Night Market at Made Local Crafthouse (4918 W. Vilet St.): Celebrate fall with this socially distanced market, featuring local vendors, food, cocktails and live music. Grab your mask and get ready for some shots, snacks and shopping during the free 3 to 8 p.m. event.
October 17—Bosom Buddies: Halloween Edition at LaCage Niteclub (801 S. Second St.): Karen Valentine and Maple Veneer explore the spooky side of Broadway during this Saturday afternoon happy hour and show. Don your best mask-inspired disguise and you might win a ghoulish prize. Doors open at 4 p.m. with a 5 p.m. show time.
October 18—Brunch with the Brunchettes at Hamburger Mary’s (730 S. Fifth St.): Eat, drink and be “Mary” during a drag-a-licious Sunday brunch! Enjoy a new brunch menu (no buffet, kids), bottomless mimosas and two fast, funny and family-friendly shows by the Brunchettes drag troupe. Check out one of two shows at 11 a.m. and 1 p.m. Seating is limited due to social distancing, so make your reservation via www.hamburgermarys.com/mke.
October 20—Gay Men’s Coming Out Group at Milwaukee LGBT Community Center (1110 N. Market St.): Feeling confused about your sexual orientation or gender identity? Express yourself, learn new coping tools and establish your own support group via this free exchange with likeminded men. The safe-space meeting runs 6 to 7:30 p.m. See www.mkelgbt.org for more details.
Have a question for Ruthie? Want to share an event with her? Contact Ruthie at DearRuthie@ShepEx.com. Follow her on social media, too! Facebook: Dear Ruthie, Instagram RuthieKeester and Twitter @DearRuthie.
