Dear Ruthie,
I’m sick of these queens who need to celebrate their birthdays for entire weekends, weeks or even months. Some even insist friends join them on expensive vacations! I’m sick of it. We all have a birthday, for fuck’s sake. Get over yourself. It’s so stupid and selfish.
I’m also not big on holidays and must-do traditions just because people grow up with them. When I meet a guy, I want to start our own traditions and celebrate the way we want to, not the way his parents celebrated or the way society expects us to celebrate. So fucking stupid. Am I wrong? Most guys I meet think I’m wrong and the relationship ends. Sort of glad I’m single this Christmas, but I don’t want to be single forever because of my beliefs. What do you think?
(Signed)
Scrooge
Dear Scroogy,
I can’t imagine the overwhelming number of Christmas party invites you must receive. Good, lord, man. Grab a glass of eggnog and take a chill pill! Loosen up a little. It’s the holidays!
Finding a man who shares your desire for simple B-day celebrations shouldn’t be hard, and it will give you one more thing in common. Your view on holiday traditions, however, might be a tougher nut to crack.
Traditions are special because they’re ingrained in our hearts for any variety of reasons. The idea that someone wants to share a custom with you should make you ecstatic, not irritated! You should, indeed, make your own traditions with your special guy, but don’t poo-poo his traditions either.
Is it really that hard for you to give in and enjoy special days the way your guy likes to? Are you unable to compromise when it comes to celebrations? Is this issue constantly causing problems in your relationships? If so, you may want to talk to a therapist regarding your seemingly angry outlook. There might be some underlying issues a professional can help you uncover and, ultimately, deal with.
In the meantime, check out my social calendar, paint the town red, meet a guy (or two or three or seven) and try to enjoy the upcoming holidays.
Ruthie’s Social Calendar
Nov. 20—Pride Ride Wisconsin Happy Social at This Is It! (418 E. Wells St.): Jack Frost might not allow bikers to take to the road, but that’s not going to stop the comradery they share. Join LGBTQ bikers from all over the city when they host this 6 p.m. happy hour at Cathedral Square’s hottest bar.
Nov. 22—Patty Smyth & Scandal at The Northern Lights Theater (1721 W. Canal St.): The warrior is back! The rock queen of the ’80s visits Milwaukee with an 8 p.m. concert that’s sure to get your heart pumping and your feet moving. With hits like “Goodbye to You,” “Sometimes Love Just Ain’t Enough” and “Love’s Got a Line on You,” as well as Oscar and Grammy nominations, Patty Smyth has proven she remains a force to be reckoned with. Nab your tickets (starting at $25) at ticketmaster.com.
Nov. 22—WREX at D.I.X. (739 S. First St.): My Windy City gal pal, T-Rex, struts her silly stuff into Cream City with the return of this popular variety show. The fun starts at 10 p.m. with drink specials and more. Don’t miss the 11 p.m. competition with new(ish) drag queen competing for a spot in a D.I.X. premiere show. If you haven’t experienced the hilarity of T-Rex, this is your chance!
Nov. 23—“Queens of the Night” at Ho-Chunk Gaming Nekoosa (949 Country Road G, Nekoosa): They got the stuff that you want, they got the thing that you need... they’re the queens of the night, and they’re taking over Ho-Chunk! Grab your tickets to the casino’s first-ever drag show at the gaming center’s Rewards Club Booth ($25 day of show, $15 in advance).
Nov. 25—Tommy Odetto at The Jazz Estate (2423 N. Murray Ave.): Misha Siegfried welcomes hottie Tommy Odetto for blues night at Milwaukee’s premier jazz club. The 8 p.m. evening of music includes a pinch of mayhem without a door charge.
Nov. 26—50 & Better Dining Club at Miss Katie’s Diner (1900 W. Clybourn St.): The team at Milwaukee LGBT Community Center understands how hard it can be to make new friends as the years go by, so they happily host this dinner club for folks over 50. Join the 6 p.m. meal, where you’re on your own for food and beverage but the smiles and friendships are free. When you arrive, simply ask for the FAB Group!
Ask Ruthie a question or share your events with her at DearRuthie@Shepex.com. Follow her on Instagram @ruthiekeester and Facebook at Dear Ruthie. Don’t miss the Halloween special from her reality show, “Camp Wannakiki Season 2,” on YouTube now.
