Dear Ruthie,
I was frisky one night, and my gf wasn’t. She was tired and wanted to wait until morning. I kept playing around with her until she relented. During the activity I stopped to go to the bathroom. I couldn’t go, however, because she held me tight until I finished the encounter. In the morning she acted like I raped her. “‘No’ means no,” she said. I think she overreacted due to all the news of sexual assaults. What do you think?
—Confused
Dear Confused,
Here’s something that won’t confuse you: When it comes to sex, “no” does, indeed, mean no. Period. When your girlfriend said she wasn’t interested in fooling around, you should have backed off. For God’s sake, do what every decent guy does in this situation: Tell your partner you love her, then hop in the bathroom, rifle off some knuckle juice and call it a night.
It’s important you talk to your girlfriend about the event, and apologize. Note that while you may have been confused by what you originally thought were mixed messages, you won’t make that mistake again. Ever.
Do not suggest she’s overacting due to the current revelations out of Hollywood and the political arena….that is, unless you want her to go Lorena Bobbitt on your sorry ass.
RUTHIE’S SOCIAL CALENDAR:
Nov. 29: Pink Hat Party at This Is It (418 E. Wells St.): The gang at Cream City Foundation hosts this month’s pink party that features drink specials, raffles, prizes and Miss Karen Valentine! Don’t have a pink hat to wear? You can buy one at the 9 p.m. fundraiser. (No, you can’t borrow mine!)
Nov. 30: ‘Intersex Stories, Not Surgery’ with Pidgeon Pagonis at UW-Milwaukee (2200 E. Kenwood Blvd.): Intersex activist Pidgeon Pagonis presents this lecture/workshop that challenges how the healthcare industry regards intersex folks. The in-depth discussion addresses hardships faced by this particular community as well as future opportunities. Learn more during the 6-8 p.m. evening.
Nov. 30: World AIDS Day Community Interfaith Service at Holy Rosary Church (2011 N. Oakland Ave.): Commemorate World AIDS Day and reflect on lives that were changed forever with this 7 p.m. service. Arrive an hour early for free HIV testing and to meet new yet friendly faces, willing to share the pain, memories and hope concerning this disease.
Nov. 30: Beards & Brews at Mo’s Irish Pub (142 W. Wisconsin Ave.): It’s No-Shave November, and Mo’s Irish Pub is celebrating with crazy moustache contests, best beard awards and more. Win prizes for your shaggy ’stache while enjoying live music at the 7 p.m. party.
Dec. 1: Opening Night ‘Scrooge in Rouge’ at In Tandem Theatre (628 N. 10th St.): Three actors are left to tackle a musical version of A Christmas Carol in this hilarious holiday performance that piles on yuletide cheer. Written by Ricky Graham and Jefferson Turner, the bawdy show runs through Jan. 7, 2018. Stop by intandemtheatre.org for $30 tickets.
Dec. 2: Sip and Shop Holiday Bazaar at The Radisson (N88 W14750 Main St., Menomonee Falls): I like to sip. I like to shop. I like the holidays. I’m bizarre. That said, this Menomonee Falls shop-a-thon is a must on my to-do list. With free swag bags to the first 15 shoppers (doors open at noon), it’s a great way to support local vendors. Cross off everyone on you Christmas list before the doors close at 4 p.m.
Dec. 2: Queer Factor at Riverwest Public House Cooperative (815 E. Locust St.): From comedians and drag queens to rappers and DJs, this variety night has it all! Featuring acts from Milwaukee, Madison, Chicago and Minneapolis, the change-of-pace night runs 8 p.m. until bar close.
Dec. 2: Make-Out Party at The Jackhammer Complex (6406 N. Clark St., Chicago): The sexy LGBT soiree that’s sweeping the country hits the Midwest with its debut in Chicago. Find a hottie and lock lips in front of the camera and you both get a free shot. Go-go boys, DJs and drag queens round out the naughty night that starts at 9 p.m.
Dec. 4: Katy Perry’s Witness Tour at the BMO Harris Bradley Center (1001 N. Fourth St.): One of the most popular singers of our time, this pop diva struts her sugary self into Cream City with her latest tour. Tickets run $27.50 to $500+ for the 7 p.m. concert. Visit bmoharrisbradleycenter.com to get yours.
Dec. 5: Old Fashioned Faceoff at Wherehouse (818 S. Water St.): When it comes to Old Fashioneds, I’m a brandy-sweet girl, but you’ll find 13 varieties mixed by the city’s best bartenders in this sip-off where you choose the winner! The fist 100 attendees get a free bite from Gypsy Taco, so arrive at the event when the doors open at 6:30 p.m. Winners are announced shortly before the end of the competition at 10:30 p.m.
Want to share an event with Ruthie? Need her advice on a situation? Email DearRuthie@Shepex.com. Be sure to follow her Facebook (Ruthie Keester) and Twitter (@DearRuthie).
