Photo Credit: Allen Halas
Ruthie
Dear Ruthie is proudly brought to you by C3 Designs — Award Winning Fine Jewelry. C3 Designs offers a variety of services performed in-house, including custom jewelry design, jewelry and watch repair, appraisal, pearl and bead stringing, engraving and flip guards. C3 Designs is the winner of the Jewelers of America 2019 CASE Award.
There’s nothing a like change in season to recharge, reinvigorate and re-discover a love of painting the town red! Check out my social calendar for some hip happenings sure to liven up your week. Whether you love autumn or dread the chilly days ahead, you’ll find just the right bash for you. First, however, let’s read a letter from a local dealing with a newly out boyfriend who is sowing his wild oats a bit later in life!
Dear Ruthie,
I’m 47 and my new-ish boyfriend is 38. I’ve been out for years, but he just came out recently. When we moved from our rural town up north and into the city of Milwaukee, his overall personality and demeanor changed completely. Now, all he wants to do is go out to the bars, flirt with other guys and party—a lot. (I should mention there were no gay bars or LGBTQ+ events where we moved from.)
Between changing cities and coming out, he’s completely changed. He's changed his wardrobe, hair, got piercings … it’s a lot. How do I stay patient while he finds himself?
Thanks,
Sugar Daddy
Dear Pops,
Welcome to Queer Puberty: Middle-Aged Edition. The experience includes impulse hair dying, late-night drinking binges, crying, expensive leather purchases and a sudden interest in TikTok dance trends.
It’s hard watching your partner cosplay as a chaotic 19-year-old, but try to remember that he’s simply catching up, not checking out. Right now, your sugar booger is a kid in a candy store, and he’s got one helluva sweet tooth. Try your best to be understanding. Heck, you may even find his renewed energy exciting and somewhat addictive!
Communicate your needs, concerns and overall feelings. Set boundaries together. Start a regular, quiet and romantic date night together. You might also want to suggest he try to find himself without getting unfortunate tattoos, renting a room at a bathhouse or buying a convertible.
Ruthie’s Social Calendar
September 17—Poly Discussion Group at MKE LGBT Community Center (315 W. Court St.): This 7:30 p.m. meeting is open to all non-monogamous folks looking to meet likeminded people for support, advice and friendship. This free, safe and inclusive gathering offers up a new topic of discussion each month. See mkelgbt.org for details.
September 20—Tennis Ball 2025 at LaCage Niteclub (801 S. Second St.): Cream City PAH hosts this daylong celebration for the kink, leather and LGBTQ+ communities. In addition to vendors, presentations and lessons, attendees will also enjoy a formal dinner followed by a night of entertainment and dancing. Check out creamcitypah.org for details and passes.
September 20—Latin Night at Walker’s Pint (818 S. Second St.): DJ Sammy T turns up the heat with heart-pounding beats on this special night of music, fun and Latin flair. The party starts at 9:30 p.m. with friendly bartenders, lively patrons and an overall great time.
September 21—Packer Party at Pop (124 W. National Ave.): Touchdown Tony and Kickoff Kujo host this wild Packer-watching party that includes a jock strap contest, halftime prizes, raffles, and food and drink specials. The game starts at noon but get there early to nab a good seat.
September 21—Dining Out for Life Wrap-Up Party at Club Charlies (320 E. Menomonee St.): Between September 18 and September 20, hundreds of folks will dine at participating restaurants where donations will be made to help those affected by HIV. (See diningoutforlife.com for a list of restaurants.) Whether you hit up one of these fantastic dinner spots or you simply want to contribute in your own way, stop by the 2-6 p.m. wrap-up party and celebrate another successful year of Dining Out for Life.
September 24—Bi Hiking at Firefly Grove Park/Dambo Troll (1900 N. 116th St., Wauwatosa): Join the gang from MKE Bi+ Pride for a 1-hour stroll. The step off is at 5 p.m. and includes plenty of friendly faces. Should Mother Nature dish out rain, the group meets at Fiddleheads Coffee (8807 W. North Ave.) for beverages, mixing and mingling.
Have a question for Ruthie? Want to share an event with her? Contact Ruthie at DearRuthie@ShepEx.com.
