Ruthie Camp Wannakiki shirt
Dear Ruthie,
My partner and I have been together almost 20 years. We love each other, but the excitement is gone. Are we doomed?
Help!
Doomed Don
Dear Donny,
Doomed? No, honey pie. If you truly felt doomed, you’d be throwing dishes, crying into a pillow and/or eating copious amounts of mint chocolate chip—not emailing an advice column.
What you’re experiencing is not a lack of love—it’s a lack of novelty. Long-term romance is less about the fireworks and more about the damn fireplace. It still gets hot, but somebody has to add the logs, clean out the ashes and dust the mantle.
Flirt again. Hug one another just for passing each other in the hallway. Schedule dates and intimacy like the priority they are. And for heaven’s sake, stop expecting your partner to magically reinvent themselves while you sit there scrolling. Experienced romance is intentional—and frankly, much better because you know what the hell you’re finally doing.
Dear Ruthie,
Whenever I watch reels on media feeds, I feel like I’m behind in life compared to everyone else. It’s upsetting and depressing. Any advice?
Thanks,
Just a Loser
Dear Friend,
You’re not a loser. We all feel this to a degree at one time or another. Stop using someone’s highlight reel to bully yourself. Social media is often an illusion—filters, angles, planning and exaggeration often sit quietly behind all of those smiles.
You are not behind; you are on your very own timeline, and it’s an awesome one! The older you get, the more success looks like peace, joy, confidence and friends who don’t drain you. If your life feels quieter, simpler or even smaller than it used to, congratulations—you’ve upgraded! Comparison fades the moment you realize your life is actually working for you!
Ruthie’s Social Calendar
January 14—Opening Night Honky Tonk Angels at Bombshell Studio Theatre (19700 W. Bluemound Road): What happens when three gals head to Nashville to follow their honky-tonk dreams? Find out with this musical that spotlights 30 classic country tunes, each sure to keep your toes tappin’. See www.bombshelltheatre.org for tickets before the production closes on January 18.
January 16—Opening Night The Wizard of Oz at Sun Prairie Civic Theatre (2850 Ironwood Drive, Sun Prairie ): Take a trip down the yellow brick road (and a road trip to Sun Prairie) when you buy tickets to this much-loved show. Based upon the classic motion picture, this delightful production is sure to warm your heart and make memories. Find tickets at www.sunprairiecivictheatre.com.
January 17—The Goblin King Masquerade Ball at Turner Hall Ballroom (1040 N. Vel R. Phillips Ave.): Step into a world of fantasy during this fourth annual event full of all the whimsy and enchantment you’ve come to expect. Signature cocktails, captivating performances, dancing, vendors and more make the 18+ ball a night to remember. Hosted by Awkward Nerd Events, the evening requires formal attire or cosplay dress. See www.axs.com for details and tickets.
January 18—Fortune Feimster: Takin’ Care of Biscuits Tour at the Riverside Theatre (116 W. Wisconsin Ave.): One of the country’s favorite actresses, comedians, writers and hosts brings her unbeatable wit to town with a stop on her hilarious tour. Nab seats to the 7 p.m. comedy concert via www.pabsttheatergroup.com.
January 18—The Wisconsin Drag Awards at The Sylvee (802 E. Main St., Madison): Double D Productions & BLB Productions serve up this celebration of the best drag the state has to offer. This annual night of glamour features fantastic performances and exciting recognitions, while bringing together the LGBTQ+ community for an evening of fun. See www.thesylvee.com for tickets to the 7 p.m. award show.
January 20—Hamilton at Marcus Performing Arts Center (929 N. Water St.): One of the top musicals of our time is heading back to Milwaukee with this stop on the national tour. The historical story is accented with a score that combines hip-hop, jazz, R&B and Broadway, serving a memorable impact on culture, politics, and education. See www.marcuscenter.org for more.
Have a question for Ruthie? Want to share an event with her? Contact Ruthie at DearRuthie@ShepEx.com.
