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Dear Ruthie,
I made the mistake of going through my boyfriend’s phone. That’s when I saw that he’s still texting to his ex. The messages weren’t sexual or anything, but they rubbed me the wrong way. Also wondering why he kept this from me. I asked if he still talked to his ex, and he told me “no.” Why is he lying to me? How do I confront him about this, knowing that I shouldn’t have gone through his phone in the first place?
Thanks,
Lazy Boy
Dear Boy,
Yikes. You opened a can of worms, and now you’re looking to wiggle your way out of it. Start by asking yourself what you were looking for in his phone? What made you decide to invade his privacy? What are you insecure about regarding this relationship? You’ll need to understand your actions well because you’ll have to explain yourself when you talk to your guy.
Yep! That’s step two. Have a sit down and admit what you did. Obviously, you’ll want to know why he lied about talking to his ex but start the conversation with the reason why you felt the need to look at his phone in the first place. Try to be calm, mature and understanding and the discussion will have a greater chance to succeed.
Ruthie’s Social Calendar
November 22—Milwaukee Trans and Queer Depot at Zao Church (2319 E. Kenwood Blvd.):
Do you take injectable hormones as part of a medically recommended regiment? Need help or advice regarding those injections? This group meets every Wednesday from 3-7 p.m., offering a safe, sober space for trans and queer folks to help one another with injection therapy, needle supplies and more.
November 23—Thanksgiving Dinner at Harbor Room (117 E. Greenfield Ave.): Celebrate Turkey Day with friends when you hit up this free dinner buffet. The good times start at 10:30 a.m. with a beer bust during the Packer game, followed by a 2-4-1 drink special from 3-7 p.m. The buffet includes turkey, ham and all the fixings so get ready to stuff yourself silly all day long!
November 24—“T’was the Night Before ….by Cirque Du Soleil” at Miller High Life Theatre (500 West Kilbourn Ave.): Celebrate the season like never before when the world-famous troop Cirque Du Soleil rolls into Cream City. An enchanting experience for all ages, the jaw-dropping performance tells the classic Christmas tale with plenty of new twists. The production closes on Nov. 26, so secure seats quickly via www.pabsttheatergroup.com.
November 25—The Taylor Party at Turner Hall Ballroom (1040 Vel R. Phillips Ave.): Relish all things Taylor Swift during this 9 p.m. dance party. The 18+ bash promises all the glitz, glamor and good times of previous themed nights held at the city’s legendary ballroom, so don’t miss out on the fun. See www.pabsttheatergroup for details and tickets.
November 25—Mr & Miss LaCage Pageant at LaCage Niteclub (801 S. Second St.): Head over to one of the city’s biggest dance clubs for a night of glitz and glamor. This 9 p.m. competition serves up performances from best-of-the-best entertainers.
November 25—Kruz Anniversary Party (354 E. National Ave.): Celebrate 17 years of the community’s favorite Levi/Leather bar with a night for the books. Doors open at 3 p.m. with the party extending until bar close. See you there!
November 26—Brunch with the Brunchettes at Hamburger Mary’s (730 S. Fifth St.): Enjoy bottomless mimosas, Mary’s famous brunch menu and a family-friendly drag show when you hit up this event. Two seatings (11:30 a.m. and 2 p.m.) give you plenty of opportunity to kick off Sunday Funday. Bop over to www.hamburgermarys.com/mke for reservations.
November 29—Horseshoes & Heels with Marquette University at This Is It(418 E. Wells St.): Marquette University’s Gender Sexuality Alliance (GSA) hosts college night at this Cathedral Square watering hole. Hit the dance floor for the 18+ wild country/western bash. The 10 p.m. night involves a $5 cover for MU students under 21, and a $10 cover for others under 21.
Have a question for Ruthie? Want to share an event with her? Contact Ruthie at DearRuthie@ShepEx.com.