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Dear Ruthie,
My boyfriend has a particularly strange habit. He doesn’t change his underwear for days on end. Sometimes up to six days. Seriously, Miss Ruthie. Most mornings he showers and everything and then puts his old underwear back on instead of new, clean ones. WTH?
He thinks I’m crazy for pointing this out and complaining, and he says that all guys do this. Do they? I don’t think so. I do the laundry for both of us, and I make sure he’s got plenty of clean underwear on hand, so this is frustrating to me. How can I get him to break this gross habit?
Thanks,
Frustrated Female
Dear Frustrated,
Eww. I’d say start by making sure he actually has enough clean undies to avoid any conflict, but it sounds like you’re on top of his tighty whitie game. I’d also suggest you talk to him about your concerns but, again, sounds like you beat me to the punch regarding his nasty knickers.
Try communicating with him one more time. Tell him that this is a topic that truly bothers you, and his lack of concern for your feelings upsets you. Let him know that this isn’t a joke to you, and it’s really something you’d like to see him work on.
Can you two meet in the middle? Maybe he can clean out his coochie critters every other day or, at the very least, a few times per week.
Is this a deal breaker for you? If so, let him know that. If not, you may need to get over it and focus on all the things you love about him.
Ruthie’s Social Calendar
July 9—Beyond the Binary Networking Event at Cactus Club (2496 S. Wentworth Ave.): Whether you're seeking career advice, looking for a mentor or hoping to expand your professional network, this event is for you. The Wisconsin LGBT Chamber of Commerce hosts this 4-6 p.m. event for trans and non-binary professionals, that promises to set participants up for success. Walk-ins are welcome but see www.wislgbtchamber.com for registration and details.
July 11—Milwaukee Area Coffee Connection at The Well Red Damsel (6429 W. North Ave.): The Wisconsin LGBT Chamber of Commerce hosts this regular coffee clutch where you can mix and mingle with likeminded business owners. Check out the city’s latest bookstore while enjoying a hot cup of joe between 8:30 a.m. and 10 a.m.
July 12—AZMR 2025 at Harbor Room (117 E. Greenfield Ave.): The Andre Zamora Memorial Ride (AZMR) is an annual charity run hosted by Pride Rides Wisconsin, the local LGBTQ+ (and allies) motorcycle social group. A fundraiser for the American Heart Association, the fun starts at 9:30 a.m. with registration; kickstart is an hour later. Don’t have a bike? No problem! Feel free to follow along and enjoy the stops via your car.
July 12—2025 African Cultural Festival at Brown Deer Park (7835 N. Green Bay Road): Stop by this 11 a.m. to 8 p.m. event and you’ll find music, food, laughter and fun! Immerse yourself in this rich culture with traditional dances, art exhibits, craft vendors, a fashion show, a marketplace, children’s activities and more.
July 12—Gaga vs. Cher Drag Brunch at Oggie’s Kitchen & Bar (741 N. Milwaukee St.): One brunch. Two icons. Endless attitude. Some of the city’s top divas serve up a brunch like never before during this 11 a.m. party. Contact www.opentable.com for tickets/reservations.
July 15—SmarTinis at Pop (124 W. National Ave.): Tuesdays are trivia nights at this popular Walker’s Point hot spot. Gather a team or play alone and you might walk away a winner during the 6:30 p.m. event.
July 16—"80’s Ladies: Featuring Dear Ruthie” at Milwaukee Night Market (West Wisconsin Ave. between Second St. and Vel R. Phillips Ave.): Join me and a few of my gal-pals for a celebration of the ‘80s at this Cream City outdoor bash. The fun starts at 5 p.m., with our musical tribute to the ‘80s stepping off at 6:45 p.m.
Have a question for Ruthie? Want to share an event with her? Contact Ruthie at DearRuthie@ShepEx.com.
