I first met a trans-person two decades ago. She was a friend of a friend. Demure and feminine, she was typically Milwaukee, down to the accent and a taste for brandy Manhattans. Had I not been told she was transgender, I might never have suspected. Then, a troupe of itinerant transgender artists and musicians, The Tranny Roadshow, came to town. One was author/artist Dylan Scholinski. He had published a nationally acclaimed book, The Last Time I wore a Dress, under his given name Daphne. It chronicled his teen years as a tomboy, when his parents committed him to a mental institution. They hoped therapy would turn Daphne into the lady-like daughter they always wanted. It didn’t work. He remained constant in his gender identity. Daphne transitioned to Dylan. Of the seven massive canvases exhibited here, one bore a succinct invective “F... Y..., dad.”
Like my first encounter, most people might not recognize a person is trans. If the gender is ambiguous, they may respond as someone recently did at an event I attended. He leaned in towards me and made a smart remark about the “drag queen in the wig.” He probably expected me to share the laugh. It wasn’t the time or place to admonish his ignorance. I simply corrected him and explained she wasn’t a drag queen.
Even for uninformed LGBs, the meaning of the “T” for “Trans” in the acronym is vague at best. I asked a friend, Valery Meyer, a trans woman, for a definition. Before we got to that, however, she offered the thought that trans people don’t change who they are, but just the “casing.” She then explained “trans” as a larger umbrella term for anyone who transcends their gender or crosses gender lines. It includes transvestites (cross-dressers) or transsexuals (those crossing sexual boundaries) or transgenders (individuals who are born one gender but identify as the opposite). The latter may surgically transition to their desired gender. Many may present themselves as the desired gender but, because of finances or other reasons, don’t surgically transition. Drag kings and queens are in the mix but play reverse gender roles for entertainment.
As for sexual orientation, the trans world offers a broad spectrum. A requirement in the 1950s and ’60s for surgical transitioning stipulated the individual had to prove an attraction to the opposite sex. Today, things are different. Currently, a trans woman is president of Milwaukee’s Lesbian Alliance. Other trans people are in heterosexual relationships.
Like any minority in this country, the trans population is the target of discrimination. Trans-phobia is rampant. It’s the simple syndrome of fearing and rejecting the unfamiliar. Over the years, it has taken the form of physical and emotional violence against trans people. Four summers ago, a trans sex worker was murdered. The defense relied on the mitigating circumstance of what one might call an honor killing.
November 20 is Transgender Day of Remembrance. It was created to recognize those victims of bigotry. As Valery explained, it’s for remembering those who lost their lives or suffered injury for simply wanting to be who they are.
