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Dear Ruthie,
I’m 49 and feel completely invisible—at work, socially, everywhere. Is this just what it feels like to get older?
Thanks,
Mister Cellophane
Dear Mister,
Invisible? Honey, please. You didn’t become invisible—you became selective. Society stops fawning over you around this age because you’re no longer easily impressed or controlled. If you feel unseen, it’s time to remind folks who you are. Speak up in meetings. Wear the jeans that make you feel hot. Make eye contact like you know secrets. Aging isn’t disappearance—it’s editing, and trust me, the final cut is fierce.
Dear Ruthie,
My body is betraying me at 48. It’s changing so fast, and I hate it. Everything is softer, slower and makes noises it didn’t before. I can’t stand it! Any advice as I barrel toward old age?
Help!
Sister Sludge
Dear Sis,
Your body isn’t betraying you—it’s telling the truth. Those snaps, crackles and pops are sounds of experience. You don’t need to shrink, hide or punish yourself. You need better bras, better shoes and good lighting. Your body has survived stress, joy, grief, late nights and fad diets—it deserves gratitude, not criticism. Always remember, sugar booger, confidence at this stage is hotter than six-pack abs!
Ruthie’s Social Calendar
February 1—Screening of Selena at Oriental Theatre (2230 N. Farwell Ave.): Celebrate the dazzling but tragically short life of diva and songbird Selena during this 4 p.m. viewing of the longtime favorite film.
February 5—Queer Writers Workshop at MKE LGBT Community Center (315 W. Court St.): Whether you’re an aspiring writer or a published pro, you’re sure to hone your skills during this motivating workshop. Writing and sharing exercises as well as free-writing sessions ensure that the 6-8 p.m. event will spark creativity. Email jmehnert@mkelgbt.org for details.
February 8—Closing Night Amadeus at Skylight Music Theatre (158 N. Broadway): Artistic passion and desire for fame collide during this nail-biting play that features two of the world’s most complicated composers. Relish the sounds of the chamber orchestra on stage, highlighting this wonderful story. Reserve your tickets at www.skylightmusictheatre.org.
February 14—Motor Mayhem with Pride Rides WI at Harbor Room (117 E. Greenfield Ave.): A benefit for MADACC, this noon to 4 p.m. bash puts a daytime spin on cupid’s holiday. Take your chance in numerous raffles, enjoy drink specials, Jell-o shots, friendly faces and more as the city’s LGBTQ+ bike group hosts the daytime fun.
February 14—Bedtime Stories 2: Slumber & Slay at Atelier by Elliestyled (1900 Sheridan Road, Highland Park, IL): Celebrate Valentine’s Day with this adult pajama party! The devilish night includes tongue-in-cheek entertainment, drag queens, dancing, games, adult stories and overall mischief. See www.eventbrite.com for tickets to the grown-up slumber party.
February 15—Galantines Drag Bingo at Hot House Tavern (N88W16631 Appleton Ave., Menomonee Falls): Grab your besties and head to this popular pub for an afternoon of laughs, food, cocktails, prizes and more. Glamour girl Dita Von hosts the 1 p.m. bingo (doors open at 11:30 a.m.), and a great time is sure to be had by all.
February 17 & 18—Blueman Group: Bluevolution World Tour at Miller High Life Theatre (510 W. Kilbourn Ave.): The colorful trio brings a unique brand of excitement to Cream City with this stop on their national tour. Two shows make it easy for you to attend when you nab seats via www.millerhighlifetheatre.com.
February 21—Winter Witch Market at Sierra Moon (213 W Wisconsin Ave., Pewaukee):
This seasonal gathering brings together witches, mystics and curious souls to celebrate the magic of winter. The unique crystal shop hosts a marketplace, spiritual services and workshops from 10 a.m. to 4 p.m.
February 28—Black Girl Therapy 2 at Wilson Theater/Vogel Hall Marcus Performing Arts Center (929 N. Water St.): Tre Floyd Productions serves up this incredible night of theater sure to be a highlight of your month. What happens when six strangers enter a group therapy session together? Reserve your tickets to the one-night-only event and find out! See www.marcuscenter.org for more.
Have a question for Ruthie? Want to share an event with her? Contact Ruthie at DearRuthie@ShepEx.com.
