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Art Kumbalek

I’m Art Kumbalek and man oh manischewitz what a world, ain’a? So listen, I hear we got a presidential election coming back up the pipe like a rancid bad burrito in a year or so. God bless America.

And we wonder, is ancient plus-80s Uncle Joe too old and farmisht to be able to find his way so’s to plant his bureaucratic butt on a ring-cushioned stool behind the desk in the Oval Office?

Maybe. But then we got this 77-year-old Trumpel-thinskin parading his “stable genius” around the town with this—to wit, divided by two:

“MSNBC’s Mehdi Hasan said all the “chatter” about President Joe Biden’s age ignores the real problems with his potential opponent: Donald Trump.

Hasan played a series of clips of Trump’s gaffe-filled speech on Friday in which―among other things―the former president claimed he beat Barack Obama in 2016, warned of a pending “World War II” and insisted that Americans need ID to buy a loaf of bread.”

“If Joe Biden had said any of those things, I guess it would’ve been front-page news on every paper in the country,” Hasan said to author Wajahat Ali. “But we just give a pass to the 77-year-old openly delusional Trump. The age debate is very weird, is it not?”

It is indeed, I agree, as I rack my memory for the correct return address to affix to the upper left-hand corner (?) of the envelope that will re-establish my prescription to Bendover magazine.

Look up the whole shebang here for copy, paste and read, what the fock:

msn.com/en-us/news/politics/mehdi-hasan-shows-just-how-openly-delusional-trump-has-become

So far, seems we got two big-time old codgers vying to grab that Oval Office where-est they can sit behind the desk, underneath a nice blanket with their walker nearby so’s to figure out the day’s newspaper mid-week crossword puzzle, as our elderly seem to enjoy.

And just so’s you now, I, Art Kumbalek, perennial candidate for the presidential highest office in the land, am a tad younger in age from Stumblin’ Joe and the Orange Circus Peanut.

And my memory is sharp as a slice of aged cheddar. For example: Milwaukee County Stadium. Hey, I remember that the Braves played ball there from 1953 ’til 1965, and that Bob “Hurricane” Hazle in 1957 helped propel the ambush victory in that year’s World Series championship, or something like that, I do recall.

Anyways, Trumpty-Dumbty seems to have a focking lock on the presidential nomination from his party of decomposed fools and ghouls. And what the fock, with 91 criminal charges baking in the courts, a couple, three or more could send his approval ratings through the roof and return America’s Lex Luthor to 1600 Pennsylvania, where he can continue his work to destroy and flabbergast truth, justice and the American way. 

Of course, he’ll need to select a running mate and I sincerely doubt we’ll see the return of Mike (The Fly) Pence. Looks like the Donald fav will be being South Dakota Gov. Kristi  Noem.

And here, Trumpski’s thoughts in regard to South Dakota’s Badlands wannabe badass bitch: Read it here:

nbcnews.com/politics/donald-trump/trump-likes-concept-female-vp-pick-meet-the-press-interview-rcna105323

“She’s been a great governor,” he told Welker. “She gave me a very full-throated endorsement, a beautiful endorsement actually.”

(“Full-throated?” Oh boy, is he talking Noem or porn-star pioneer Linda Lovelace for Veep. Cripes, who does this shyster think he is, Bill Clinton? Not even close. But I’ll tell you’s, as a perennial candidate for the highest office in land, I very well may reach across the aisle and select the Melania to run with me on a ticket cause I’ll tell you, a full-throated endorsement courtesy of that Slovenian gold-digger sounds like just what the doctor ordered). 

And, one more thing about the aging of so-called competence. Check it out:

Trump: We’re Leading Obama in the Polls by a Lot (msn.com)

While the media continues to obsess over President Joe Biden’s age, Donald Trump is displaying signs of diminished cognitive ability. During his speech at the Family Research Council’s Pray Vote Stand Summit in Washington, D.C., Trump boasted that, despite his arrest, he’s “leading by a lot, including Obama.”

OK. This “Family Research Council’s Pray Vote Stand Summit.” Is there not somewheres in the focking Bible that Psalm-ically poetically sings to relieve sufferers of this-and-that from utter bullshit?

But, this, memory:

Stormy Daniels, the once former full-throated paramour of our 45th “president.” This excerpt from her book, Full Disclosure, from NBC News: Daniels had lingering remorse over the experience for years, writing that any time she’d see Trump on television, she’d think: “I had sex with that, I’d say to myself. Eech.”

So let’s get out of here with a little story: This little kid just got potty trained. But when he went to the bathroom to go Number One, the kid managed to hit everything but the toilet. So mom had to go clean up every time the kid went to take a leak. After two weeks, she had enough and took him the doctor.

After the exam, the doctor said, “My good woman. The problem for your son is that his, shall we say, ‘unit’ is too small. An old wives’ tale is to give him two slices of toast each morning, and his unit will grow so that he can hold it and aim straight. You may want to try that.”

Next morning the little kid jumped out of bed and ran downstairs to the kitchen. There on the table are 12 slices of toast. “Mom!” the kid says. “The doctor said I only had to eat two slices.” The mother says, “I know. The other ten are for your father.”

Ba-ding! ’cause I’m Art Kumbalek and I told you so.