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These days, much is said about the many benefits of pursuing a contemplative practice.
Among these practices, we include meditation in its various forms, journaling, centering prayer and insight-oriented psychotherapy, among others. What all have in common is a mental and spiritual journey inward. These disciplines constitute an exploration of one’s inner space, the boundless world of psyche and soul that resides within.
Multiple studies show contemplative people enjoy better mental and physical health, as well as higher rates of overall well-being. They are less susceptible to negative stress and emotional hijacking, they have greater mental resilience, often exhibit enhanced emotional intelligence and live more in the present moment rather than ruminating on the past or worrying for the future. So, given these many paybacks, why wouldn’t everyone want to join the contemplative club?
Many spurn exploring their inner existence because, quite simply, it unnerves or frightens them. That’s not true for all, of course. For some folks, contemplative practices are not their path to greater well-being or transcendent experiences. Instead, they might pursue service to others—more of an outward reaching way to better know one’s self and achieve greater meaning and purpose. What’s more, there are those who feel so overwhelmed by tasks and timelines that adding one more thing, like journaling, seems ill-advised and counter-productive. Nonetheless, many are those who tell me they can’t meditate, for example, not due to time pressures, but because they find the experience mentally or emotionally uncomfortable.
Adding to anecdotal accounts, there is some research showing contemplative practices focused on self-examination and self-awareness prove disturbing to those who are struggling with inner conflicts or emotional distress. Most of these folks want to avoid so-called navel gazing because, when they don’t, they end up experiencing heightened anxiety, deeper depression, excessive worry or even a sense of nameless dread.
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Going Inside
“I don’t like going inside my head,” Michael told me after I asked him to consider adopting a contemplative practice—in his case, journaling.
“What happens when you do?” I inquired.
“I get agitated and can’t sit still, so, then, I start looking for something to do. I find a way to distract myself.”
Distraction is a core mental survival strategy for folks like Michael. The most effective way to exit inner space is to lock on to something in one’s outer space, so to speak. At its extreme, folks of this ilk feel compelled to busy themselves with external pursuits just about every waking moment. Silence and the absence of activity pose a mental threat. It creates a psychological vacuum that allows unresolved issues to bubble up into the individual’s awareness. This conundrum is typified by the adage, “Don’t look back, something may be gaining on you,” except this is about not looking in.
“The person you spend the most time with is yourself,” I told Michael. “Until you feel more comfortable being in your own psyche, your agitation will always be there, making peace of mind impossible.”
To his credit, Michael pursued journaling, although in small doses to start. As his comfort level with contemplation increased, he took up mindfulness meditation. Over a period of months, he faced his inner demons, put aside some resentment and regrets and developed a more compassionate perspective on his inner struggles. He made peace with himself, warts and all.
Which is what, at their core, contemplative practices offer—a path to greater self-understanding and self-acceptance. When at peace with ourselves, meeting the challenges posed by the external world proves far less difficult. Also, we re-learn the capacity to just be, rather than constantly feeling compelled to do, do, do. Finally, contemplation helps clean out the storm of nattering thoughts that buffet the psyche.
As the Chinese philosopher Lao Tzu said, “Muddy water, let stand, becomes clear.” The mind follows suit.
For more, visit philipchard.com.
