The Pain Gain

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Woman Rock Climbing

A woman freehand rock climbs a cliff

It was a gully washer. The blasting rain conveyed the same sensation as a bucket of water being thrown in my face more or less constantly. My sailing buddy, Todd, squinted to see over the deck of his sailboat as we bashed into the stiff chop thrown up by the blustery wind. There wasn't much to see. Visibility had largely become invisibility.

Still, within the tempest, we smiled knowingly at each other. This was just what we needed. An ordeal. By the time we pulled up to the dock, we looked like wet dish rags but felt like a million bucks apiece.

Sometimes feeling wonderful requires first feeling awful. Illogical as this may sound, joy and pleasure are not always the product of a steady succession of good times (sometimes boredom is). Happiness is not based on an arithmetic principle; one fun plus another fun does not necessarily equal twice the fun.

Comfort from Discomfort?

On occasion, experiences of adversity, struggle, difficulty and even outright physical pain facilitate the arrival of good feelings. While this may sound like heresy to devotees of positive psychology, there is some conventional wisdom (and many cliches) suggesting that discomfort is often a prerequisite to comfort.

No pain, no gain—adversity builds character—there are no peaks without valleys—no pressure, no diamonds—it's always darkest before the dawn. All these adages, among many others, point to the revolving door of pain and pleasure. 

Using pain to produce pleasure is the basic principle behind strenuous exercise, like power lifting, competitive running and other forms of self-torture. As a friend of mine wryly put it, “If you're pounding your head against the wall, you feel better when you stop.”

Thrill of Relief

Some of us create the agony of vein-popping exercise in order to later enjoy the thrill of relief. A few folks throw themselves overboard with such notions, like my ex-brother-in-law who always declined Novocain at the dentist because "pain reminds me that I'm alive." Yeah, so did my mortgage payments, but I didn’t ask them to raise the interest rate every month.

The dark side of this principle emerges when people who are mired in deep emotional suffering engage in self-harm. Some feel that by inflicting physical pain, their emotional pain will ease.

But, for most of us, a reasonable amount of adversity or discomfort is often just the tonic for mind malaise, particularly for those of us engaged in mental work much of the time. I don't know about you, but after a day of thinking and shrinking, I begin to wonder if my mind hasn't left my inert body for a purely cognitive manner of existence.

Whatever Works

The antidote? Well, a gut-busting workout at the health club is one prescription in this regard, but I'm biased toward physical adventures rather than a boring succession of laps, arm curls or high intensity training. But whatever works.

Some of those so-called “nuts” you see leaping into Lake Michigan in January, dancing in the rain, jumping from a sauna into a snowdrift, repelling from cliffs, running some wild rapids or hiking rugged backcountry trails are often regular folks jolting awake their sleepy spirits with a cold splash of raw, uncomfortable experience. 

When Todd and I had squared away the sailboat, settled below in the cabin and replaced our soaked attire with dry, warm clothing, we felt the tingling but relaxed energy and mental acuity that often follows a taxing adventure. We enjoyed the blessing of feeling fully alive.

So, if your brain seems packed in cotton, your body feels inert, your mind seems mired in a funk or your visceral existence is gradually being erased from the space/time continuum, inject yourself back into real life.

Do something that feels bad.

It may prove to be for your own good.

For more, visit philipchard.com.