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After a two month wait for our out-of-state survey research company to finally send us the tabulated results of the Shepherd Express’ 2025 Valentine’s Day sex survey, here are the results. Twenty years ago, we ran the survey for four years from 2004-2007 so we will describe any interesting changes in the sexual experiences of the readers who wanted to express their views. This is just a voluntary survey. It is in no way a scientific poll, but it is still fun to learn what others are thinking and doing.
What is Normal When It Comes to Sex?
The most common question when it comes to sexual interests, desires and activities is “What’s Normal,” since sexual interests and desires are very “Primal.” No one can definitely explain why one person is totally turned on by something that someone else might find boring, odd or even disgusting, but that’s the way it is. The only bottom line is that any of the activities in question must only be done by “consenting adults.” If two adult people share an interest in a particular sexual activity, then for them, it is normal even if some governments or cultures ban it.
Who responded to our survey? Forty-one % of the respondents were women and 55% were guys, and four percent said other. Sixty seven percent were straight, 20% bisexual, 11% gay, one percent asexual and one percent were “other.”
Sixty two % are in a relationship and half that group, slightly over 31% are madly in love and slightly less than 31% are content. Twenty-four percent are single and happy. Fourteen percent are miserable with six percent being miserable in their relationship and nine percent are miserable single
Best Way to Meet the Love of Your Life
Perhaps the most important question is, what is the best way to meet this “love of your life”? Despite all our modern technology, slightly over half our respondents fall back to, “Friends first, then let the relationship develop.” Online dating was selected by about 20% of respondents and a little over ten percent chose “getting fixed up by friends.” The rest felt just being out and about has worked for them whether it is social, religious or other organizations and, of course, bars and clubs.
Another big question is: What Are You Looking For? Obviously, there are multiple answers to this question. Over 93% of you said sexual attraction, and 91% said common interests. Apparently, many of you had some difficult past experiences since over 81% looked for emotional stability. About half of the respondents felt similar political leanings were very important along with financial stability. Interestingly, 20 years ago when we ran the sex surveys for four straight years, political leanings were definitely not particularly important.
Regarding when you lost your virginity, whether we use the mean age, median or mode, they are all 18 years of age and only less than half, 45%, used protection. Perhaps that was because it wasn’t the plan, but the passions just took over the moment.
How Honorable Have Our Respondents Been with the Partners?
A very important question was how honorable you have been with your partners. Forty percent of the respondents said they cheated on a partner but over 60 percent said that they have been cheated on. There was some forgiveness because despite 60 percent having been cheated on, only 40 percent said it ended the relationship.
There were some high percentages for things that might surprise you. Over 60% said that they faked an organism at least once. Over 45% said that they had been caught masturbating, and 40% said they have masturbated at work. Regarding fantasizing about another person while making love to their partner, over 42% have confessed to that.
What role does alcohol and recreational drugs play in our sexual activities? Over 55% of the respondents said alcohol and drugs do play a part in their sexual activities and 35% say that they play absolutely no role.
One quarter of the respondents said that they have been forced/coerced into having sex with someone. That’s a bit scary.
On whether you told someone that you loved them and not meant it, slightly over 70% said that they would never lie about love. Only a little less than 7% bragged that they lie about saying that they love someone to get laid and it works every time. Jerks
Speaking of jerks, five percent of the respondents suffered the humiliation of having an ex-partner place graphic images of them on the internet.
On the positive side of the internet and sex, 47% said that the internet has opened them up to new things in their sex lives and over a third felt that the internet was a safe outlet of fantasies that they can’t live out in real life. On the downside, 22% felt it encourages bad behavior, and slightly over 16% said it hurt their relationships.
Over 75% of the respondents never had a sexually transmitted disease, STD, and over 80% believe that if you do have an STD, you should definitely disclose it before having sex.
What have You Actually Done in the Bedroom?
So, for the curious minds, what have the respondents actually done in the bedroom. The respondents in this year’s survey have had much broader experiences and are more adventuresome than those who answered our surveys 20 years ago. Eighty nine percent have engaged in hetero sex, which is probably expected, but interestingly 41% have had same sex experience. In this year’s survey, 93% have had oral sex and 59% have had anal sex which are significant increases from our surveys of 20 years ago. Thirty percent have had three-way sex and 13% have had group sex, again significantly higher percentages from 20 years ago.
The novel, Fifty Shades of Grey, apparently have had a big influence because the percentage of respondents who have engaged in spanking as sex play hit 43% this year compared to low single digits back twenty years ago. Bondage and domination play also increased almost 10-fold.
Seventy five percent of the respondents have used sex toys, 35% have posed for lewd pictures and over 10% have cross-dressed.
From the results of this one voluntary survey, it sounds like the current Milwaukee population has become a lot more adventuresome when it comes to sex. We are definitely not the 1950s Milwaukee when it comes to sex.
