Long-Simmering Dispute
In Italy, an unnamed 48-year-old woman was ordered to pay $1,000 in late October after failing to peacefully settle a two-year dispute with her mother. The daughter, a vegan, threatened her mother with stabbing after the mother prepared… Bolognese meat sauce! The daughter told the court she had long avoided “sensory and olfactory contact with animal products” before moving back in with her mother, but, The Telegraph reports, there was an escalation of aggression between the two women since their renewed cohabitation. The March 2016 complaint quoted the daughter as saying: “If you won’t stop on your own, I’ll make you stop!” as she grabbed a knife. “Quit making meat sauce, or I’ll stab you in the stomach!”
Leading By Example
Kids at Pierre Part Primary School in Pierre Part, La., thought they knew what to expect during Red Ribbon Week, an annual alcohol awareness program, but a school administrator threw them a curveball, reported WBRZ-TV. Rachel Turley, 49, assistant principal at the school, was on her way to work on Oct. 29 when other motorists reported that she was driving dangerously on Highway 70. Officers caught up with her at the school and took her to a police substation, where they determined her blood alcohol content was .224, nearly three times the legal limit of .08. She was charged with DWI and careless operation. “The fact that she chose to do this on the Monday of Red Ribbon Week is a slap in the face,” commented Niki Lacoste, grandparent of a Pierre Part student.
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A Clean Getaway
A homeowner in Upper Tantallon, Nova Scotia, Canada, received an unsettling phone call from a neighbor on Oct. 16, saying there were two strangers in her house. The door had been left unlocked, so a neighbor could walk the dog, CTVNews reported, and police expected to find that the home had been “cleaned out,” said Nova Scotia Royal Canadian Mounted Police spokesperson Cpl. Dal Hutchinson. Instead, the two women inside the house had cleaned up: They were employees of a cleaning company and had gone to the wrong address! They left without realizing their mistake. Hutchinson praised the neighbor for being so observant and noted the silver lining: The house was cleaned for free.
A Hairy Situation
The Associated Press reported on Nov. 7 that Virginia’s Fifth Congressional District has a new Republican representative, Denver Riggleman, who beat Democrat Leslie Cockburn despite Cockburn’s suggestion in July that Riggleman was unfit for the office because of a Bigfoot erotica book he had written, The Mating Habits of Bigfoot and Why Women Want Him. While Riggleman is, indeed, the author of Bigfoot Exterminators Inc.: The Partially Cautionary, Mostly True Tale of Monster Hunt 2006, he says the erotica book was a joke among his military buddies and himself. Incidentally, local distillery owner Riggleman entered the race when the incumbent, Rep. Tom Garrett, dropped out after announcing he is an alcoholic.
Cocky Pilots
Two unnamed U.S. Marine Corps flyers have been grounded pending an investigation after they flew a penis-shaped flight pattern over the Salton Sea on Oct. 23, the Los Angeles Times reported. The pilots were outed by a Twitter account called “Aircraft Spots,” which tracks flight patterns. Josef Patterson, a USMC spokesman, said the jokesters are assisting with other duties in their squadron at Air Station Miramar in San Diego. They can’t take credit for the idea, though: In November 2017, a U.S. Navy jet crew flew in a similar pattern over Washington, D.C.
Dad’s in the Basement
Steven Carroll, 61, and his brother, Michael, 57, had been trying to solve the mystery of their father’s disappearance since 1961, when George Carroll “went out and just never came back,” as their mother, Dorothy, explained it to them. Michael bought the family’s Lake Grove, N.Y., house in the 1980s from Dorothy, who died in 1998. The brothers eventually decided to have the home radar scanned and, indeed, radar detected that there was something about five feet below the basement floor. A few months ago, Michael’s grown sons began digging, and on Oct. 30, they unearthed human bones. According to Newsday, dental records and DNA will be used to determine if the bones belong—as everyone suspects—to George Carroll, a process Suffolk County chief of detectives Gerard Gigante says could take months.
© 2018 ANDREWS MCMEEL SYNDICATION
