Scooters are for the Birds
Bird Scooters (pay-per-minute electric scooters) arrived this summer in many a U.S. city and welcomed by many residents, but in some places, the handy people transports have met with less-than-positive reaction. The Los Angeles Times reported on Aug. 10 that angry residents are throwing Bird scooters off balconies, heaving them into the ocean, stuffing them into trashcans and setting them afire. Robert Johnson Bey, a Venice Beach maintenance worker, said: “Sunday, I was finding kickstands everywhere. Looked like they were snapped off.” What’s worse, the perpetrators are documenting their destruction on social media; Instagram has a “Bird Graveyard” account devoted to filmed chronicles of scooter desecration. Culver City resident Hassan Galedary, 32, had a visceral reaction to the scooters. “I hate Birds more than anyone,” he said. “They suck. People who ride them suck.” However, he has stopped defacing them: “I can’t put bad energy into the world. I don’t even kick them over anymore.”
That’s a Lot of Flockin’ Birds
Agents of Columbus (Ohio) Humane executed a warrant on a home in the Clintonville neighborhood on Aug. 14 in response to complaints about birds inhabiting the home. Columbus Humane CEO Rachel Finney told The Columbus Dispatch that concerns about the birds’ well-being were warranted: Officials found more than 600 birds inside, including macaws, African gray parrots, Amazon parrots and other species. “It’s pretty overwhelming to step into the house,” Finney said. Removal took all day, and Columbus Humane was undertaking the task of examining each bird from beak to tail. Finney said the agency would decide which birds might be adoptable after assessments are complete. As for the owner, she said, “We’re confident we’ll have charges; it’s just a matter of which charges and how many.”
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Finding Karl-Friedrich
German police took a baby squirrel into custody on Aug. 9 following an incident in which it chased a grown man down the street. The Guardian reported that an unnamed man summoned Karlsruhe police when he simply could not shake the tiny squirrel. But when officers arrived, the squirrel suddenly lay down and went to sleep. Officers felt sorry for the exhausted little rodent, who apparently had been separated from its mom and was looking for a replacement in the terrified man. Police named their new mascot Karl-Friedrich, then took him to an animal rescue center, where he was doing very well.
Pee-utiful Paris
In Paris, the designer of a recently installed sidewalk urinal on the Île Saint-Louis says the new device offers “an eco-solution to public peeing.” But Reuters reports that nearby residents and business owners are unhappy about the urinals, saying they are “immodest and ugly” and will “incite exhibitionism.” The so-called uritrottoir—a mashup of the French words for “urinal” and “sidewalk,” looks much like a plastic trash receptacle, and local mayor Ariel Weil says they’re necessary. “If we don’t do anything, then men are just going to pee in the streets,” Weil states.
Thoreau Would Be Pissed
Dr. Jay Curt Stager and his colleagues, researchers at Paul Smith’s College, have released results from a study showing that Walden Pond, made famous by naturalist Henry David Thoreau in the mid-1800s, is an ecological disaster, thanks to human urine. The pond was declared a National Historic Landmark in 1962, and the site in Concord, Mass., draws hordes of tourists each year. But NBC News reports that swimmers urinating in the water for generations is the most likely cause of high levels of nitrogen and phosphorus in the pond that cause algae to spread and block the Sun’s rays, devastating the fish population. The study authors suggest building a swimming pool nearby to take pressure off the pond.
All of One A-Coard
Colorado Mesa University in Grand Junction, Colo., is footing the bill for a possible $46,000 reprint job after a recent graduate found a typo on his diploma. Alec Williams, former editor of the school’s newspaper, was examining his sheepskin when he found a line reading “Coard of Trustees,” instead of “Board of Trustees” under one of the signatures. “There was this moment of laughing at it, and the more I thought about it, the more frustrated I got, because I’m sitting on $30,000 worth of debt, and they can’t take the time to use spellcheck?” he said. CMU President Tim Foster told The Grand Junction Daily Sentinel that the school will send out corrected diplomas to 2018 grads. But that same typo goes back to all of the school’s diplomas since 2012. Those earlier graduates can request a new diploma if they want to. “This mistake is all ours,” he said.
© 2018 ANDREWS MCMEEL SYNDICATION
