News of the Weird newspapers illustration
Carrots for Carnivores
Arby’s has turned the trend toward plant-based “burgers” on its head with the new Marrot: a carrot made out of meat. Vice reported that Arby’s has definitively rejected the plant-based meats movement. “(W)hat Americans really want is great, tasty meat,” said Jim Taylor, Arby’s chief marketing officer. “So, we said if others can make meat out of vegetables, why can’t we make vegetables out of meat?” The Marrot is made by rolling raw, ground, turkey breast into a carrot shape, cooking it sous-vide for an hour, covering it with a special “carrot marinade,” and then oven-roasting it for another hour.
The Litigious Society
Tommy Martin, 58, of Mount Holly, N.C., hopes to see Hardee’s in federal court after a “humiliating” incident at a Belmont store in which Martin was given just two “Hash Rounds” on his breakfast plate, rather than the half-dozen or so depicted on the company’s website. Martin, who is black, told The News and Observer that he felt like he was in a scene from the segregated 1960s when he asked for more. “The manager came back and said that’s what you get. Got home with tears in my eyes,” Martin said in his handwritten lawsuit filed on Monday, June 24, in U.S. District Court in Charlotte. The cashier was prepared to give him more of the small potato roundels, Martin said, but the manager (who is white) stepped in and gave him a refund instead.
Coffin-ated Coffee
A café in Bangkok, Thailand, is encouraging customers to “experience the death awareness” and reflect more on their lives by inviting patrons to get into a coffin and spend some time with the lid closed after finishing their coffee. Death Awareness Café owner Veeranut Rojanaprapa told United Press International that the practice encourages people not to be driven by greed. “When the lid of the coffin closes, they will realize that eventually they cannot take anything with them.”
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It Was Just a Matter of Time
A baby boy born in West Java, Indonesia, in November 2018 was given a most memorable name by his parents, Andi Cahya Saputra and Ella Karin. Eight-month-old Google was so named, Saputra told Indonesian media, because “Google has a great meaning. Google is number one in the world, the site most visited by people.” The Mirror reported Saputra told his own father he hopes his son will become “a useful person” and “help” a lot of people, while also explaining that they didn’t want to “dilute the essence” of the boy’s name by giving him a middle or last name—he’s just Google.
Reese’s Road Trip
Sebastian Swenson of Blaine, Minn., wanted Reese’s candy, and he wanted it now. So on the morning of Tuesday, June 11, the 4-year-old climbed into the front seat of his great-grandfather’s Hyundai Santa Fe and drove at low speeds to a nearby gas station, where police met him. To accomplish this, according to Fox9, he had to reverse out of the driveway and navigate winding residential streets before getting onto a busy four-lane avenue in rush-hour traffic. Along the way, he dinged a few mailboxes and a tree, but he arrived safe and sound.
Mission Accomplished
Michael Wardian, 45, chose the hottest day of the year so far in Washington, D.C., to tackle a longstanding goal of his: He ran all the way around the Beltway—89 miles. Wardian, of Arlington, Va., started at 1:30 a.m. on Saturday, June 29, and ran for almost 18 hours, according to Fox 5 DC. “You’re like, ‘I want to do this, but it’s never a good time,’” Wardian said. “So, I just did it when I had the time.” Temperatures on June 29 reached 96 degrees.
Epic Fail
In Rybnik, Poland, a 68-year-old woman who was completing the “maneuvers” part of her driving exam struck and killed a 35-year-old driving examiner on Monday, June 24. Police believe the victim was testing another candidate at the time, the Daily Record reported. Deputy Police Commissioner Ryszard Czepczor said it was unknown how the accident happened; the woman was in a state of shock afterward, “and because of that, speaking to her would be quite difficult.”
© 2019 ANDREWS MCMEEL SYNDICATION
