Dear Ruthie,
I masturbate shortly before I hookup with anybody. I just get too worked up thinking about the sex I’m about to have, but more important, the extra release helps me last longer during the main event.
I recently told my best friend about this, and he said I was a crazy sex addict. It never bothered me before, but now he’s got me thinking. Do you think anything is wrong with this? I’m not a sex addict am I?
Thanks,
Handy Man
Dear Man,
Well, aren’t you a horny little guy? Excitable? Anxious? Maybe. Sex addict? I doubt it. In fact, lots of guys pull the pigeon before plowing the field largely because, as you noted, it helps them last longer. So, tell your buddy to mind his own beeswax.
As long as masturbating isn’t causing issues with your health or personal life, as in missing work, causing legal issues, etc., it’s usually healthy and normal. If you truly feel, however, that you may have sex addiction issues, then you should see a professional therapist if for no other reason than to clear your mind...and shut up your bestie.
Ruthie’s Social Calendar
August 19—Freedom on Wheels Presentation at Milwaukee LGBT Community Center (1110 N. Market St.): The Milwaukee County Transit System teams up with the city’s LGBTQ+ community center for this free 5-6 p.m. presentation. Learn what the transit system has in store for you and how you can best take advantage of this valuable service.
August 20—Outdoor Yoga & A Smoothie at Milwaukee Public Market (400 N. Water St.): Enjoy a safe, social distanced beginner’s yoga class at the Riverwalk Commons. Bring your own matt and mask for the 1-hour session that begins promptly at 6 p.m. and ends with a free smoothie. Due to a limited class size, you must pre-register for the $20 event via www.milwaukeepublicmarket.org/classes/outdoor-yoga. Call 414-336-1111 with questions or to register on the phone.
August 20—Bianca & Kendra’s Live Virtual Bingo on Facebook Live: Join Wisconsin drag divas Bianca Lynn Breeze and Kendra Banx$ for a free night of fun. Simply email biancaandkendrajewels@gmail.com for your bingo card (before noon on August 20), then join the Facebook Live event at 8 p.m. on Bianca Lynn Breeze’s page. Win prizes, socialize safely and have a few laughs at the same time!
August 24—TGNC Virtual Support Group Hosted by Milwaukee LGBT Community Center (1110 N. Market St.): If you identify under the trans umbrella (gender non-conforming, genderqueer, non-binary and trans folx), consider attending this 6 p.m. online group. Topics are chosen by participants and steered by a counselor. Join the group at www.hangouts.google.com/group/BVSyqSBdSmb8QspPA or email Alex Corona (accorona@mkelgbt.org) with questions.
August 24—Karaoke Night at This Is It (418 E. Well St.): Masks may be a requirement but having a great singing voice it not! A kooky night is in store, whether you sign up to sing or simply sit back and watch the fun. The singing machine cranks up at 9 p.m. along with the bar’s legendary drink specials.
August 25—Trivia with Sylvia at Mary’s Arcade Bar (734 S. 5th St.): Are you smarter than a drag queen? Find out when you don your thinking cap (and mask) and head over to corner sports bar in the Hamburger Mary’s campy complex. Enjoy Mary’s infamous menu while using your noggin to win prizes with drag-queen hostess Sylvia Nyxx.
Have a question for Ruthie? Want to share an event with her? Contact Ruthie at DearRuthie@ShepEx.com.
