Photo courtesy Camille Mays
Camille Mays
Camille Mays
Not long ago, I read this in the Milwaukee news: “A man was shot and killed and another person injured at Sherman Park. This represents one of 94 homicides so far in 2024.”
When I read about a homicide, my thoughts shift to the victim’s family members and what they endure after a tragic loss. Walking past the lawns in some inner-city neighborhoods, I sometimes see memorials for the victims of gun violence or car crashes—stuffed animals, framed photos, candles, beverage bottles, and personal memorabilia, all makeshift memorials and impromptu shrines.
When news of a nearby shooting reaches neighborhood residents, they immediately check the internet to see if it happened to a relative or friend. In 2019, it happened to Camille Mays. On Nov. 10, 2019, her 21-year-old son, Darnell “Booka” Woodard, was killed by two gunmen who were robbing him.
I recently spoke with Mays at a central city coffee shop. She was forthright in discussing her tragedy and its aftermath. To stay busy, she has two jobs, doing peer support work at Mental Health America, and at the MPS MKE recreational wellness department. Soon, she will be doing floating sound baths with the Aquatics Department.
Where did you grow up? What were your parents like, your family, your schools, and the neighborhood?
Most of my life, I lived in the Lindsay Heights neighborhood. I did not move to the Sherman Park neighborhood until 2012. I went to Holy Angels School and then to Rufus King High School. My mom passed when I was 15, and I ended up living with my grandparents. My dad was working in Texas, but I’ve always had a good relationship with him.
When did you start your own family?
I had my oldest son before I graduated from high school. Then, I had my second son, Darnell, when I was 21. Then, later had my third son, Jacarrie. Raising three sons was a big job, but I had help raising them.
What did you do after you got out of high school?
Mostly, I was just working, in factories and office shops. My last jobs were at AT&T and WE Energies. After that, I started doing community work and for nonprofits. I’m the kind of person who doesn’t like to hear complaining. I say, “What are we gonna do about it?” I got involved in doing things I was passionate about. I did campaign work, for instance, working with different politicians. But I got out of politics and worked in community organizations. In 2015, I started my Peace Garden Project.
You are kind of noted for that. What is the Peace Garden Project?
About ten years ago, I was walking through the community with my alderman and a few city officials and discussing safety issues. We came across several makeshift memorials on the lawns of crime victims, teddy bears, personal items, scattered memorabilia. To me, this looked too much like a cemetery. The residents were complaining. I came up with the idea of the Peace Garden, planting beautiful flower arrangements on the deceased person’s front yard, all done with the permission of the families. I received donations and help from community members, and I had support from the city for my Peace Gardens.
The Tragic Death of Her Son
Let’s talk about November 10th, 2019. Your son, Darnell ‘Booka’ Woodard, was killed by two gunmen when they robbed him during a drug deal. Booka was shot five times, and he was only 21. Can you take me through that day, how it affected you, and how you eventually processed this tremendous loss?
Neighbors were in a community group chat that we often had. Whenever there was a shooting or an accident, people would post that information to the group. There was a mention of a shooting, but I did not know it was my son, Darnell. The night before, I had a real ill feeling, and I called him, and he said, “I’m good, Mom,” and he told me he loved me. Then, the next morning at 7AM, the police were at my door, and they showed me a picture of my deceased son, and asked “Is this your son?” I lost it, and don’t remember much more. But then people were at my house, my best friend, other friends, neighbors, co-workers. And then the local news people showed up.
After planting all those peace gardens for those who lost their loved ones to violence, now the violence was happening to you.
I know. I was so grateful for the support because I did not know what to do. I remember doing a news interview and said we were gonna find the killers. The police did find the murderers within 30 days. That was the longest 30 days of my life. I had been kind of floating through life. I was caring for my grandmother and my third son. I feel my son, Booka, kept me going. I knew he wouldn’t want me to just give up. I tried different forms of therapy, individual and group. The best support for me came through people who had lost loved ones as I had.
I believe you said, “Two weeks after Booker’s death is when everything disappeared. All the support and the food and the people, it disappears.”
True. After a few weeks, people still had their own lives. But I appreciate what everyone did for me. I shifted my own work and activities to healing and wellness, working with different people who have experienced trauma.
NOTE The police did catch her son’s killers. Jhaylen McCaskill, 21, was charged with first-degree intentional homicide and attempted first-degree intentional homicide, and was sentenced to life in prison. His co-defendant, Devin R. Jones, 22, was charged with felony murder and was sentenced to 30 years in prison.
How did it make you feel when the killers were caught?
There is no happiness because my son was still gone. Not only was our family affected but also other families and friends who knew him. For me, there will never be enough time for the pain to go away.
What was your son like?
He was so funny, very comical, and also very loving. He was protective of family and friends. From the time he was a little boy, he was determined. If he got an idea, he was gonna do it. He was stubborn as a kid, but he overcame that. He had a beautiful spirit. We miss his light in our family.
Dedicated to Community Work
Even before your son was killed, you founded the Peace Garden Project that brings people together to work on community gardens and beautification. The peace gardens were planted for victims of homicide. Are you still involved in that project?
Now, I work on community gardens and reimagining green spaces. I have community partners like MSOE, Rutgers University, and UWM, but not specifically peace gardens. I do have one mother I will help start a peace garden. Keep in mind that sometimes the people who did shootings are still around. I’d rather be the person who’s there for a victim’s family two months after a loss. It’s hard for me to rehash my feelings about my own loss.
I understand that it seems like the Sherman Park neighborhood kids know you, that you often ask the boys and girls you run into what they’re doing and where they’re headed. Similar to the local street leaders, you believe in block-by-block community care. Can you elaborate?
I think it’s important that we have community officials in neighborhoods, not just police. It’s good to know your neighbors, talk, say hello, look out for each other. Get to know the neighbors in front of you, beside you, and behind you. We know each other’s cars, something going on with the kids, teaching kids how to cross the street, people just keeping an eye out.
You have 12 years of community organizing experience. One of your objectives is to provide trauma care and healing to the residents and organizers, and those who have suffered from gun violence. How do you go about that?
People sometimes come to me. I’ve worked with children in schools, at summer camps, at hospitals, at the medical college, and with groups dealing with trauma. You never know when trauma shows up. Everybody doesn’t suffer from trauma or grief or have mental illness, but we all need to balance our mental wellness. I do a lot of work outside grief and trauma. For me to share my trauma with others is healing for me.
I read that you have over 100 houseplants and that they help you heal. You once said, “The plants are like a constant reminder to change and grow.”
I did sell a lot of my plants, but I still have about 30 or 40 houseplants. Caring for plants is so refreshing. It is a constant reminder that every day we are growing and changing. A leaf falls off, or it needs watering, or the plant looks a little peaked, and then it’s full again.
When you talk to people about gun violence, what do you say?
It’s not the guns who do the killings, it’s the people. I would like to see assault rifles eliminated. But no matter what laws are created, it is always the bad people who get their hands on guns, and so I find myself struggling on how to tackle that problem. You never know what to be prepared for. I try to support people and meet them where they are at. It is selfish to expect people to see through your eyes. They have their own eyes. I just try to give people tools on how to deal with a loss.
What are your plans for the future?
I got big dreams. I’d love to have a retreat center. I will continue on the wellness journey, my own healing journey. And I’d love to do a meditation book
I did not know you practice meditation.
Oh, yes. I do the sound baths with other people, and it is relaxing for me, my mind, my body. When I’m playing my singing bowls, I am in the zone. I hope the sounds from my crystal bowls bring comfort to other people facing trauma.
