Photo courtesy Colette Shumpert
Colette Shumpert
Colette Shumpert
Colette Shumpert’s life has meaning. As a Milwaukee inner city resident, she is a business professional, pastor, mentor, public speaker, and life coach. She is also an author of two books, one dealing with the loss of someone you love.
Colette Shumpert knows about loss. On December 7th, 2012, her 24-year-old son, Michael Brown Jr, was shot and killed by Jonathan Thomas, in the 2800 block of North 15th Street. The heartbreak aftermath of losing Michael has motivated her to help other people who have experienced devastating losses.
I asked Shumpert if we could have a conversation about her process of grieving and recovery. As I explained, my purpose was to show interested readers what people endure when they experience a tragic loss through needless violence. I also intended to focus on her healing process, which has inspired Shumpert to help others who have lost loved ones to violence.
We met and we talked. She held nothing back.
Where did you grow up? What were your parents like, your family, schools, and the neighborhood?
I grew up in the inner city with two brothers. My mom was a single mother, and my father was not present for most of my childhood. When I was about five, my father moved to Michigan. I went to several high schools in the Milwaukee area. I was 17 when I got pregnant with Michael. I attended Lady Pitts, a high school for pregnant mothers. Michael was born in 1988. 24 years later, he would be shot and killed. Eventually, I graduated from Lincoln High School of the Arts.
What did you do after you got out of high school and what was your career path?
I got a part time job at Hardee’s. Later, I drove a school bus for five years until 1994. By then, I had another child. I needed to support my small family. I started attending MATC, but realized I needed to get a job where I could have a chance to advance. I was hired at Fortis Insurance downtown. Later, Fortis became the Assurant Insurance Company. My first full time job with the insurance company was for $6.25 an hour. 21 years later when I left that job in 2017, I was making $35 an hour, and I had three children.
You did very well after having a difficult start.
Working at the insurance company was a major life lesson for me. The things I learned, the people I met, were amazing.
On December 7, 2012, your 24-year-old son, Michael Brown, was shot on 15th Street and died of his wounds the next day. He was killed by Jonathan Thomas, who he thought was his friend. Can you take me through that day step by step, how it affected you, and what you did to process this tremendous loss?
At the insurance company, I was managing people, and it was the time of year when we did our personnel evaluations, and I was at home and on the phone with my co-worker, Marsha. I got a call from my son Michael’s fiancé. She said, “Michael’s been shot, but he’s still alive. He waved his hand at me when they put him in the ambulance. They took him to Froedtert Hospital.”
Suddenly, I was in a fog, walking in circles. I was home alone. I was in shock. I don’t even remember the drive from my house up North Avenue to 76th Street over to Froedtert Hospital on 76th Street. I do remember thinking I have to call the Saints, the people I knew would pray and believe that God was a miracle worker. I am an ordained pastor and was having church at my home on Sundays with people who were not attending a traditional church building.
I went to the hospital emergency room, and I was taken into a small room. Eventually, two doctors came in and told me that because Michael had been shot in the head, they rarely see people recover from that kind of wound. They said that the next 24 to 48 hours were crucial. Then, the doctors left.
They left you all alone to deal with all your emotions. That had to be hard.
Yes, I was alone, but it wasn’t long, and people came including Michael’s best friend who found him wounded and called 911. When he touched me to console me, he had some of my son’s brain matter on his hand. We all went to the ICU, and we waited, and we prayed. That was the hardest night of my life. No sleep for 36 hours. Then, I got the news that Michael would not survive. (Colette is crying, tears streaming) I remember standing in his room saying, “God, if this is the road you’re gonna take me down, then I need two things, please don’t allow my son’s life to be in vain, and I need you to go with me because I am not going to be able to do this without you.” Suddenly, I knew his life would not be in vain because the hospital staff asked if Michael could be an organ donor, and I said yes. This was a way for Michael to now help others. I later found out that Michael had registered to be an organ donor which meant we were in agreement even after his death.
And Michael’s organs saved several lives, as I recall.
Four individuals received his kidneys, heart and liver, and they were saved. Some others received his tissue donations. Eleven people in all benefited from Michael, and they lived in different states. Later, when I finally got home, I could not even move for a long time. For many days, life was a fog. I could barely get out of the bed. I was facing a whole new process.
Back then, I believe you said, "My son has a legacy, and there is no need out of tragedy to not allow life to still become a part of someone else. It is important to me we do what we can as a community knowing that patients need organs to survive.”
I remember that statement. There was nothing I could do to change my son's situation. I prayed, and God answered in the midst of my storm. The healthcare people who carried out the Michael’s organ donations were wonderful. They had Biblical names, Thomas, Elizabeth and Greg. This was important to me when I look back over that night because I knew God was there. Another thing I remember is going to the bank to get money to pay for Michael’s funeral. When the woman clerk asked, ‘How are you?’ I started crying, and told her how my son had died. She came around the glass and embraced me, and she cried with me.
Seems like people came out of nowhere to help you.
I believe God was looking out for me because He knew what I needed.
Jonathan Thomas shot and killed your son Michael. Did you ever speak to him when he was in prison for homicide?
That evolved over time. At first, I believed I would never get closure. Finally, eight years later during Covid, I knew I had to forgive Jonathan. I wrote him a letter, told him about what he took from me, but I forgave him and wrote to him about forgiveness. A month later, Jonathan wrote back and said he was moved that I would forgive him and that he was sorry for everything he caused.
For you, it was closure, and in your heart, you forgave him. Did that help you?
It set me free. In a way, I had been in jail. Locked up in the pain of my loss. I felt as if death could not win twice.
After a time, you became a spokesperson for organ donation for the Versiti Blood Center and their Organ Donations division. How did that come about?
At first, I volunteered at the Versiti Donor Network, stuffing envelopes, and then I went through training to become one of their speakers to advocate for organ donations. I worked mostly in the African American community at churches and community meetings to bring awareness to the importance of organ donations. I did that work for about five years.
You created CVictorious, a company that crafts Transitional Shawls or Prayer Shawls for individuals suffering from grief. I think this was part of your being a pastor when comforting people who have suffered devastation. Tell me about that.
I took a lot of my own money and had the prayer shawls made for those who lost loved ones to violence. I wanted to leave more than just a hug. I wanted them to feel the presence of God even if they weren’t believers.
At some point, you started a coaching business and became a coach, speaker, and trainer with the John Maxwell Team. I believe you are focusing on helping those who are dealing with grief and loss.
John Maxwell is a renowned speaker, trainer and coach. I took his course and became a certified coach, trainer and speaker. I used my experiences and my ministerial calling to help people who are coping with loss, to show them they can process their grief and find life after loss. When loss happens, people are more resilient than they seem to be aware. At first, I was working with mothers who had lost children. I had prayer breakfasts once a year. At the yearly prayer breakfast, the focus would be to encourage mothers who had lost children using the word of God and illustrations. I believe people want to heal, but they don’t always know what that takes. Healing has to be intentional, you must decide to heal, or you won’t heal.
And I understand people were calling you for help.
They were. I’d get calls from people I did not know. This happened through word of mouth. The calls might be from people who may have read my book Walk it Out!, a prayer journal about healing and loss.
Here is a quote from you: “You have to be willing to participate in your healing journey: otherwise, it can’t happen.” Can you elaborate?
Yes, yes, yes. If you are not going to be active in the healing process, healing will not proceed. I will say that in the African American community, we may not know what healing looks like because there is a lot of violence in our neighborhoods, which breeds a non-healing environment. That is why it’s so important to be active in the healing classes, groups and therapy. You have to get up each morning and say, “Today is gonna be a new day. and it won’t be like yesterday.”
In my own experience with the African American community, and I’ve talked about this with the street leaders. There seems to be a lack of hope within many families. It’s like a family doesn’t plan for a future, but rather its members live day to day. That’s hard, particularly on the young people in a family, and that lack of hope spreads through the Black community.
When you were saying this, I thought back to when I got my first full time job with the insurance company and how that gave me hope as a single mother with children. Right now, I’m not sure enough of us see what opportunities are available, and what hope looks like. If you live with violence in your community, it’s hard to find a way out.
It’s in your head, and you carry it with you.
Yes.
Colette Shumpert’s book, Walk it Out! 21 day Devotional and Prayer Journal - Healing in Loss, can be found on Amazon books.
Get Walk It Out! at Amazon here.
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