News of the Weird newspapers illustration
Avocado-armed and Dangerous
A 47-year-old resident of southern Israel approached a teller at a Postal Bank branch in mid-May, handing her a note that read, “Hand over the money in the drawer” (misspelling the Hebrew word for “drawer”), The Times of Israel reported. As the teller hesitated, the robber said, “Put the money in the bag quickly, or I’ll throw this grenade,” referring to a black object in his right hand. The teller gave him the equivalent of $4,450 in cash, and the robber left. Five days later, he repeated his method at another branch, where he netted another $3,300. Police tracked him through mobile phone records and other clues, eventually discovering the “grenade” he wielded was an avocado he had painted black.
Hot Wings Hot Rod
A 16-year-old driver was pulled over by the Royal Canadian Mounted Police in Manitoba, Canada, on Thursday, June 6, after being clocked driving 105 mph, according to Fox News. The teenager was driving a Chevy Camaro, but it wasn’t the muscle car that made him go so fast, he said. He told police that it was likely because he had just eaten several hot chicken wings. Officers were unmoved, however, tweeting, “Absolutely #noexcuses for that kind of speed.” The teen was fined and is likely to have his license suspended.
Vandalism, Schmandalism
In the Arctic region of Murmansk in Russia, an abandoned railway bridge was the quarry of ambitious metal thieves who removed the 75-foot-long center span, leaving only the support structures near either shore. Locals noticed the section was missing in May, reported the BBC. While the missing span would have weighed about 62 tons, it was estimated to be worth only about $9,000. Russian law enforcement is looking into the theft, but locals are nonplussed: One mused that the remaining structures would be “eyesores” for a long time to come, then shrugged: “Ah, who cares; this isn’t Germany. Restoring order to the landscape is not high on the agenda.”
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Russians Lending a Hand
Men looking for diversion in Krasnoyarsk, Russia, entered the Male Slapping Championships, part of the Siberian Power Show, in March, wherein contestants slap each other so hard that some of them sustain concussions. According to RT News, female Siberians now have their own contest called the Booty-Slapping Championships. For this event, which took place in mid-June, the women, all fitness enthusiasts, take turns whacking each other on the derriere until one is knocked off balance. Fitness blogger Anastasia Zolotaya, one of the contest’s winners, features demonstrations of the serious workouts she uses to toughen her buns on her Instagram page, @sportnastya.
Tapioca Tap Out
If you’re a fan of bubble tea, you may want to add it to your “all things in moderation” list. On Tuesday, May 28, a 14-year-old girl in Zhejiang Province, China, went to the hospital after suffering from constipation and being unable to eat for five days. Through a CT scan, doctors found unusual spherical shadows in her abdomen, reported Asia One, which they suspected were undigested tapioca pearls from bubble tea. The girl reluctantly admitted to drinking only one cup of bubble tea five days before, but doctors said her condition indicated she had consumed much more and prescribed laxatives. One doctor warned that the “bubbles” in bubble tea are made of starch and are difficult to digest, especially if not thoroughly chewed.
Getting Beethoven’s Goat
A lock of Ludwig von Beethoven’s hair sold at auction on Tuesday, June 11, for an unexpected 35,000 British pounds (about $45,000), “Inside Edition” reported. Sotheby’s said the framed hair was given by Beethoven to a friend, pianist Anton Halm, as a gift for Halm’s wife almost 200 years ago. Reportedly, when Halm asked for the gift, a servant snipped some hair from a goat and presented it to Halm. Beethoven was incensed, saying, “You’ve been tricked. This is not my hair. It’s the hair of a goat!” He then cut a lock of hair from the back of his own head, wrapped it in paper and turned it over to Halm. A Sotheby’s expert confirmed that the auctioned hair was, indeed, human, but there is still no way to know for certain the hair is actually that of the great composer.
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