News of the Weird: Week of April 11, 2024

Expand

News of the Weird newspapers illustration

Democracy in Action

As the November presidential election looms, with incumbent Joe Biden, 81, and former President Donald Trump, 77, squaring off again, some American voters would like to see literally anybody else on the ballot -- and Literally Anybody Else, of North Richland Hills, Texas, wants to give them that chance. A 35-year-old seventh-grade math teacher and U.S. Army veteran who legally changed his name from Dustin Ebey, the candidate says his goal is to inspire change. "America should not be stuck choosing between the 'King of Debt' (his self-declaration) and an 81-year-old," reads the declaration on Else's campaign website. "Literally Anybody Else isn't just a person, it's a rally cry." NBC-5 Dallas Fort Worth reports that Else needs the signatures of 113,151 registered voters who did not vote in the presidential primary, by May 13, in order to run as an independent candidate.

Ssssurvivor!

We've heard of dogs and cats going missing, only to turn up at their owners' doorsteps weeks, months or even years later; now we can add snakes to that list. The BBC reported that the Royal Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals were recently called to a residence in Spennymoor, County Durham, to rescue a 3-foot-long corn snake atop a garage roof; the snake had escaped a crow that attempted to carry it off. When a neighbor came by to see the rescued critter, she recognized it as her pet snake, Agnus, who had been missing for a year. RSPCA inspector John Lawson was surprised the snake had survived out in the cold for so long. "The vet believes Agnus had gone into brumation mode, similar to hibernation, and her body had shut down in order to survive," Lawson said. Agnus received treatment for a respiratory infection before being reunited with her owner.

Have It Your Way, Pal

Some people go to extremes to get a great deal, but on March 31, one disgruntled customer at a Burger King drive-thru in Willowick, Ohio, pulled a firearm on an employee who was trying to give him a discount on his breakfast items. The employee, Howard Vernon, 38, told WOIO-19 News that when he gave the customer his total, the man argued that it should cost more. "I'm, like, trying to explain to him that we had a promotion going on ... and he started cussing and getting all loud," Vernon said. The enraged man drove his gray Honda sedan out of the drive-thru but quickly returned, then stepped out of his car and pointed a gun at Vernon. After threatening him and calling him racial slurs, the man returned to his car and sped away. "It was about some bread and sausage sandwiches at 9 o'clock in the morning on Easter," Vernon said, "and you're that mad that you'd put a gun in somebody's face?" Authorities are still searching for the customer.

Male Pattern Boldness

Hey, fugitives have feelings, too! After the Avon and Somerset Police posted a wanted notice on Facebook on April 1 describing Daniel Kellaway, a wanted fugitive, as "white, about 5 ft. 9 in., of average build, with brown eyes, receding hairline ...," Kellaway (or someone claiming to be him) replied, "No need to mention the hairline, guys." A comment posted by the same account the next day reminded the police that Kellaway's birthday had passed since the information was compiled for the notice, and that he was now 29. Kellaway is being sought in connection with driving offenses, criminal damage and threatening behavior, so while social media users got a kick out of Kellaway's comical posts, authorities have warned the public not to approach him and to call authorities if he is spotted.

Ghastly

After having lurked quietly on the shelves of Harvard's Houghton Library for the better part of a century, the philosophical meditation "Des Destinees de l'Ame" has undergone a facelift, according to a statement issued by the library in March. The book was acquired by the school in 1934, along with a note explaining the process of preserving human skin. The book's previous owner, an eccentric French bibliophile named Dr. Ludovic Bouland, claimed to have added the "human touch" (read: human skin) to his prize because "a book about the human soul deserved to have a human covering." The cover's origin could not be confirmed until 2014, and NBC News reported that this eventually led to an ethical review in 2023 and the recent decision to rebind the book in something less macabre.

Youth Inaction

              -- Young people are cutting loose and losing their blues in Cambodia, but rather than embracing the "Footloose" of it all, the Guardian reports that Prime Minister Hun Manet is cracking down on the source: vehicle owners and operators who replace their cars' standard horns with ones that blast popular tunes. So enticing are these familiar refrains that young Cambodians are literally dancing in the streets, which the prime minister says poses a traffic hazard. He has directed the ministry of public works and transportation, along with Cambodia's police force, to crack down on vehicle operators whose horns emit anything other than the standard honk.

              -- Students and parents at Alston Ridge Elementary in Cary, North Carolina, have been dealing with a unique carpool annoyance: an aggressive pest of a turkey. WTVD in Durham reports that the bird pecks at cars, windows, people -- any perceived threat in "his" territory. "This was a young male turkey who probably was looking for a mate ... and was unable to find one," said Cary Animal Services Officer Beth Wilson. "He was trying to claim a territory, and I guess he decided the carpool lane was going to be it." Wilson predicts Lonely Tom will chill out -- just as soon as his hormones die down.

Heart in the Right Place

Thinking she had spotted an abandoned baby hedgehog on the side of the road, an animal lover in England carefully gathered the creature into a box lined with newspaper and took it home, setting out some cat food and leaving it undisturbed overnight. After realizing it hadn't moved or eaten, she took the box to Lower Moss Wood Nature Reserve & Wildlife Hospital in Cheshire the next morning, where hospital manager Janet Kotze "realized ... it wasn't a hedgehog." The fluffy, spiky, hedgehog-colored "creature" was actually the pom-pom from a winter beanie. Because the elderly rescuer had kept her distance through the night, she hadn't noticed the ball's lack of eyes or ears. But her compassion melted the staff members' hearts; Kotze said the woman "did absolutely the right thing -- aside from the fact that it wasn't a hedgehog."

All the Luck

A Pennsylvania shopper took home one heck of a gift-with-purchase: the cashier's diamond wedding ring. Cindy Tristani, a cashier at a Burlington in Uniontown, told WPXI-TV that she looked down during her shift and realized her ring was gone. Her co-workers joined her in a panicked search, but found nothing. In what she called "a long shot," Tristani posted on a local Facebook group's page: "If anyone was shopping at Burlington Uniontown today, I think my diamond ring might have fell in someone's bag." This all happened on Tristani's mother's birthday -- "She's been dead for three years, but she could always find anything" -- so the cashier included a plea to her mom in a quick prayer before getting back to work. Lo and behold, customer Cait Giles checked Facebook on the way home (no, she wasn't driving), saw the post and checked her shopping bags. Jackpot! Returning the missing ring "made my heart so full," Giles said. "It was the best moment."

Send your weird news items with subject line WEIRD NEWS to WeirdNewsTips@amuniversal.com.  

News of the Weird is now a podcast on all major platforms! Visit newsoftheweirdpodcast.com to find out more.                                        

COPYRIGHT 2023 ANDREWS MCMEEL SYNDICATION

1130 Walnut, Kansas City MO 64106; 800-255-6734