News of the Weird: Week of January 19, 2023

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Cavity Sam Lives

On Jan. 9 in Kyiv, Ukraine, a surgeon removed an unexploded grenade from the chest cavity of a 28-year-old Ukrainian soldier, The Guardian reported. The weapon lay just below the man's heart, and two "sappers" (military engineering soldiers) were on hand during the delicate operation to neutralize the device after it was removed. Doctors were unable to use electrocoagulation, a method that controls bleeding, because of fear that the grenade might detonate. "I think this case will go down in medical textbooks," said Anton Gerashchenko, Ukraine's internal affairs ministerial adviser. No word about how the grenade ended up in the soldier's chest cavity to begin with. He will now undergo rehabilitation. 

Least Competent Criminals

Two arsonists were in the hot seat -- and they hadn't even been caught -- after they set fire to a Bakersfield, California, immigration services building on Jan. 2, Fox News reported. Footage from a Ring security camera captured the masked individuals as they spread gasoline around the building's base. But when one bent to light the fire, the flames spread to both people's clothes, causing them to run away screaming. The suspects are still at large. 

Eyewitness News

Riders on the MAX light rail system in Gresham, Oregon, witnessed a brutal assault around 2 a.m. on Jan. 3, KPTV reported. A 78-year-old man on the train platform was attacked by another man, who "chewed off the victim's ear and part of his face," police said. "The injury was so severe that responders could see the victim's skull." The suspect did not provide investigators with a real name, but through fingerprints he was identified as Koryn Kraemer, 25, who had recently moved to the area from Georgia. He was charged with assault in the second degree. 

Aero-naughty-cal News

Passengers aboard a charter flight on Jan. 8 from the Siberian city of Magan, Russia (where it was 41 degrees below zero), had to brave even more extreme temperatures when the rear door of the plane flew open in midflight, the New York Post reported. "People had their hats blown off," said Sergei Lidrik, 33, a passenger headed to Magadan on Russia's Pacific coast. One man had just unfastened his seatbelt when the door blew open, and he was nearly sucked out, along with luggage and other personal belongings. The plane, an Antonov An-26, was manufactured between 1970 and 1986. The pilot turned back to Make an and made an emergency landing, and there were no injuries.

It's Baaaacckkk

The atmospheric river battering California has another weird consequence, SFGate reported on Jan. 10. The storms are making the Golden Gate bridge eerily "sing." Nearby residents first noticed the phenomenon during summer storms in 2020, when they heard a "screeching that sounded like torture." A Building and Operating Committee report from 2020 said the cause was the retrofit of 12,000 slats on the west side of the bridge. The cost to add clips that would stop the noise is $450,000; officials said installation is due in the coming months. 

Inexplicable

In Coventry, England, someone dubbed the Cat Shaver is catching cats and shaving a square into their fur, Metro News reported on Jan. 11. Not just a small patch, either: 6-year-old Tallulah had a large bald spot on her stomach that owner Bonnie Towe noticed when her daughter picked the cat up. "Did someone take her and bring her back? Or did they do it in a car?" Towe wondered. "We did notice she wasn't going out quite as much. She mostly sits at home and looks out the window." Other victims' owners have discovered one another on Facebook, speculating that the cats are being marked as targets. But no other harm has come to any of them. 

Mistaken Identity

A walker out for a stroll in Wickham, Australia, in early January came across what they thought was a dead body clothed in a tracksuit, according to ABC News. Police cordoned off the area and began an investigation, but later concluded that the remains belonged to a cow. Roeburne Police Sgt. Dale Harmer voiced his frustration: "It has caused police to use an entire day and three police officers guarding a scene for something which was never a human in the first place." And what a waste of a perfectly fine tracksuit. 

Check Twice, Engrave Once

The Washington, D.C., Korean War Wall of Remembrance pays tribute to more than 36,000 American service members who were killed in that conflict. But according to The New York Times, it's also rife with misspellings and omissions. Historians Hal Barker and Edward Barker Jr. of Texas, who run the Korean War Project, call the monument "a damn mess" and say it displays more than 1,000 spelling errors, and 500 names are missing altogether. The National Park Service passed the buck to the Defense Department, which supplied the names. DOD said compiling the list was "challenging." "No one bothered to check it before they set it in stone," said Ted Barker. "But now that it has been done, we need to get it right." 

Compelling Explanation

Fans of romance writer Susan Meachen were devastated in September 2020 when they read on her Facebook page, titled "The Ward," that she had taken her life in response to online bullying, CNN reported. So imagine their surprise in early January when they read a new post there, claiming to be from Meachen herself. "I debated on how to do this a million times and still not sure if it's right or not," the post read. "There's going to be tons of questions. ... My family did what they thought was best for me and I can't fault them for it. ... I am in a good place now and I am hoping to write again. Let the fun begin." When a fellow romance writer asked for an explanation, Meachen responded, "I simply want my life back." Her former assistant, Connie Ortiz, told CNN she was "devastated" by Meachen's acts. "I did not know what Susan was doing, even though we were close." 

Break Out the Crab Legs

Firefighters were called to the Associated Milk Producers Inc. plant in Portage, Wisconsin, on Jan. 2 after flames broke out there, WMTV reported. But they were hampered by melted butter: "Butter was running down like 3 inches thick on the steps, so our guys were ... trying to drag the hose line. The hose line got so full of butter they couldn't hang onto it anymore," said fire Chief Troy Haase. The Wisconsin Department of Natural Resources was called in after the fire was contained to assess the butter runoff, some of which went to a water treatment plant. But about 20 gallons ended up in a nearby canal; booms were used to contain the buttery mess. Officials say the environmental impact appears to be low. 

What's in a Name?

Someone bought a winning $15.1 million Megabucks ticket at -- wait for it -- Wayne's Food Plus in Luck, Wisconsin, WISN-TV reported on Jan. 5. "We could not be happier for the winner," said store manager Paul Wondra (also a great name). "They truly got lucky in Luck." 

Send your weird news items with subject line WEIRD NEWS to WeirdNewsTips@amuniversal.com.