News of the Weird: Week of March 2, 2023

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Can't Possibly Be True

A newly released report from the U.K.'s Air Accidents Investigation Branch has determined that an inflight incident on June 29, 2022, could have turned out "very different," CNN reported. On that day, a flying instructor slumped over on a pilot's shoulder as they flew a small plane above Lancashire, England. The pilot, who had asked the instructor to accompany him because of wind conditions that day, thought his cohort was "just pretending to take a nap" as a joke, but after landing the plane, he realized the instructor had died. The report noted that the instructor likely "suffered a cardiac arrest as the aircraft took off."

Unclear on the Concept

Neurosurgeon Charlie Teo, 65, appeared before Australia's Health Care Complaints Commission in February to defend himself against charges relating to a brain tumor surgery he performed on a woman, ABC News reported. "I took out too much. I took out the wrong bit of the frontal lobe," Teo said. "I actually didn't know at the time. I'm learning from this case. It wasn't negligence. Maybe some ignorance on my behalf." The woman was left in a vegetative state and died several weeks later. Teo said one of the complainants against him had been "hoodwinked" and "coerced" into filing the charge by Teo's "enemies." "I did the wrong thing. Was that my intention? Absolutely not," he said.

Least Competent Criminal

Quanisha Manago, 28, of Kershaw, South Carolina, got a special delivery on Feb. 13, but it wasn't from Amazon. WHNS-TV reported that Lancaster County Sheriff's officers were tipped off about a package coming Manago's way with valuable contents: two large bricks of cocaine, weighing over 6 pounds. Working with other agencies, an undercover agent delivered the box to Manago's home, then watched as she stored it in her car and started to drive away. That's when she was arrested. Sheriff Barry Faile said the cocaine had a street value of more than $180,000. "Thanks to all who participated, it will never hit the street," he said, adding the packaged was shipped from outside the United States.

Government in Action

• On Jan. 19 in Austin, Texas, Chris Newby was sleeping when "the whole house shook," he said. "It sounds like a plane hit the house." Instead, according to KXAN-TV, it was a car -- an impaired driver barreled through Newby's spare bedroom wall. "The entire room was just crunched," he said. Ten days later, Newby received a letter from the city informing him that he was in violation of two codes: "One for having a hole in my house and one for having no window," Newby said. The letter was dated the day of the crash and stipulated that he had 30 days to get repairs completed or face fines of up to $4,000 per day. "It felt tone-deaf to me," he said. "I'm in violation for being a victim." But Matthew Noriega, a division manager at the code department, said Newby has time: "If an extension is needed, we will give them that extension," he clarified. Still, Newby said Austin "feels a little less like home every day." Sad emoji.
• In Florida, the state senate Democratic leader and canine fun-ruiner Lauren Book filed a piece of legislation that would make it illegal to let a dog "extend its head or any other body part outside" a moving car window, WTSP-TV reported on Feb. 21. The bill has other pet-related provisions relating to animal safety, including prohibiting pets riding in the open beds of pickups and drivers holding a dog in their lap. If passed, the bill will become law on July 1.

Weird Science

Just looking for a few minutes of peace and quiet? You might be tempted to step inside the anechoic chamber at Microsoft headquarters in Redmond, Washington, Oddity Central reported. However, even if you were allowed to try it, you might find it unbearable -- it is the world's quietest place, at -20.3 decibels. (Calm breathing clocks in at 10 decibels.) "As soon as one enters the room, one immediately feels a strange and unique sensation which is hard to describe," said Hundraj Gopal, a speech and hearing scientist who helped design the chamber. "When you turn your head, you can hear that motion. The longest continuous time anyone has spent inside the chamber is 55 minutes," Gopal said. Microsoft uses the room to test microphones, receivers, headphones and speakers.

Awesome!

When friends presented tattoo artist Karen Green with a brand-new iPhone in 2007, she never even opened the box, CNN reported. She had recently upgraded her unsmart phone and didn't want to switch carriers, "and I figured it's an iPhone, so it'll never go out of date," Green said. On Feb. 19, Green's still-shrink-wrapped first-edition iPhone sold for more than $63,000 through an online auction with Louisiana-based LCG Auctions. Featuring a 2-megapixel camera and "sharp corners front and back," the phone sold originally for $599. Green will use the funds to support her tattoo business.

 (Not a) Fetish

Don't call Aakash Majumdar's attraction to balloons a fetish. The 28-year-old resident of Mumbai, India, identifies as "objectum sexual," meaning he's attracted to inanimate objects -- but not just sexually. News.com.au reported on Feb. 16 that Majumdar wakes up every morning and "makes out" with his balloons, which he sleeps beside. "I like their presence and warmth, and share intimate feelings with my balloons and vice versa," he said. "When you're in love, you spend a lot of time together and accept all kinds of flaws." Of course, being balloons, they're vulnerable: "One day while inflating a few balloons with a pump, a balloon got popped," he said. "I cried for the loss and after that, I became more careful."

Great Art!

Nick Stoeberl, 33, was awarded a Guinness world record in 2012 for the male with the longest tongue (3.97 inches), United Press International reported, and now he's putting it to good use. Stoeberl, who's been dubbed Lickasso, is making paintings with his organ, selling them for up to $1,200 each. The California man said he wraps his tongue in plastic wrap first, then plies his art on canvas. "Why not express myself through that medium?" he asked.

Bright Idea

Post-COVID, Carnival parades have resumed in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil, and one unnamed man was ready to PAR-TAY! The Daily Mail reported that on Feb. 19, military police arrested a man wearing a 7-foot-tall penis costume and flip-flops; he had allegedly been chasing women in the city center and "acting suspiciously."

News That Sounds Like a Joke

Oh, to never be a teenager again. Around 1 a.m. on Feb. 20, a homeowner in Centereach, New York, heard loud noises coming from his yard, Fox News reported. His surveillance video showed six people kicking down several sections of his fence. About three hours later, the suspects, aged 12 to 18, returned and ran through the fence together, apparently in completion of a TikTok challenge mimicking the Kool-Aid man. Officers caught up with the kids around 4:15 a.m. and charged them with several counts of criminal mischief; some of them had also destroyed fences in other parts of Suffolk County.

Send your weird news items with subject line WEIRD NEWS to WeirdNewsTips@amuniversal.com.

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