The Terrorist of Inverclyde
John Stevenson of Inverclyde, Scotland, hit a bump in his plans to vacation in the U.S. this month when his visa was denied after he declared himself to be a terrorist while filling out a Department of Homeland Security online form commonly known as the ESTA. One of the questions on the form asks, “Are you a terrorist?” Stevenson, 70, told The Independent that his “yes” response was in error, adding that the site kept timing out and crashing as he and his wife, Marion, tried to answer the many questions. “I even called the border control in the U.S. and gave them my passport details,” he said. “They looked up my ESTA number and said, ‘You’re a terrorist.’ The only time I’ve ever been in court was for jury service. I don’t know why that question is on the form in the first place.” Update: United Airlines refunded the Stevensons’ airline tickets and gifted them two free flights to New York once their visa troubles are all worked out.
Robber Boxed In
A successful heist at an electronics retail store requires careful planning and attention to detail—a fact that appears to have escaped a man in North Raleigh, N.C., on Nov. 12. That night, the News and Observer reported, an employee of the store called 911 to report that a man had entered the store with a semi-automatic weapon and ordered workers into the stockroom. He also has a cardboard box, which he used to load up mobile phones and smart watches. He filled the box as well as two crates from the store with merchandise totaling more than $26,000. When he left through the back door, he took the crates with him, but not the cardboard box he brought with him; the box sported a shipping label with a name and address on it. Police used it to track down Brian Clark, 22, and arrest him for armed robbery with a dangerous weapon and conspiracy to commit robbery.
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Perfect for the Trump Administration
Yoshitaka Sakurada, 68, a 22-year member of Japan’s parliament, was named by Prime Minister Shinzo Abe in October to two new posts: Cybersecurity Minister and Olympics Minister. But, according to Reuters, at a committee meeting on Nov. 14, when a member of the opposition asked Sakurada about his computer skills, Sakurada admitted: “I’ve never used a computer; I’ve always directed my staff and secretaries to do that computer stuff.” He went on to assure lawmakers he’d do a fine job protecting Japan’s computers from hacking.
The Truth Hurts
An unnamed substitute teacher in Montville, N.J., won’t be returning to Cedar Hill School after revealing a sacred secret to first-grade students there on Nov. 29. Superintendent Rene Rovtar told NJ.com that the sub got into a debate with a student about whether Santa Claus is real. That’s when the 6-year-olds started quizzing her about the Easter Bunny, Tooth Fairy and Elf on a Shelf, and the teacher “proceeded to debunk all of it,” Rovtar said. Parents reported doing “damage control” after the kids returned home from school, upset that their firmly held beliefs had been assailed. The sub is no longer welcome in the district.
Too Much of a Good Thing?
Things got “a little hectic” in Clarendon, Va., on Dec. 5, when an unexpectedly large number of delivery drivers convened at the Cheesecake Factory in response to a 40th anniversary promotion offering free cheesecake slices. The sweet treats were available only to those who ordered on DoorDash, ARLnow.com reported, and a crowd of delivery drivers double-parked outside and jostled for position inside the restaurant as they picked up orders. Arlington County police and medics responded to reports of fights and disorderly conduct, resulting in arrests and minor injuries.
PETA Pedantry
The animal rights group PETA launched a new campaign on Dec. 4 designed to remove some common animal-related idioms from the English language. CBS News reports the group tweeted suggested alterations to phrases it says are verbal vestiges of “speciesism” and perpetuate harmful messages. PETA offers these alternatives: For “bring home the bacon,” try “bring home the bagels.” “Take the bull by the horns” should be “take the flower by the thorns.” And “kill two birds with one stone” morphs into “feed two birds with one scone.” PETA likened the use of the original phrases to racist and homophobic language: “Phrases that trivialize cruelty to animals will vanish as more people begin to appreciate animals for who they are.” Reaction on social media was swift. Maybe PETA should just let sleeping…bags...lie.
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