Photo Credit: Allen Halas
Ruthie
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Dear Ruthie,
My partner gained a sick amount of weight over the last 3 years. He’s gone from being a hot 165-pound twink to topping the scales at 212 lbs.! His face doesn’t even look the same anymore.
I guess what I’m saying is that I’m no longer attracted to him. My attempts help get him back to a reasonable size have fallen on deaf ears, even though he says he wants to lose weight. I don’t want to sound shallow, but I feel like I need to end this relationship as I’m not attracted to him anymore. Do you have advice on how I can get him lose weight and save this relationship before I pull out (emotionally and physically)?
Thanks,
Shallow Hal
Dear Shallow,
Besides his looks, what was it about your boyfriend that you were originally attracted to? Does he have a big heart? A great sense of humor? Is he particularly artistic or politically motivated? Start focusing more on those important values and characteristics and less on his looks.
If you find this renewed focus isn’t changing your outlook, then…you may want to start looking inward. A little soul searching may teach you more about yourself and what you value in others. Note that any discoveries you make about yourself may not be pretty. In other words, you could find that you are, indeed, shallow.
If a physical attraction is the only thing that kept this relationship together for you, it might be best to let your boyfriend go. He deserves to find someone who loves him for the person he is—inside and out.
Ruthie’s Social Calendar
February 29—“The Price is Right Live” at Riverside Theater (116 W. Wisconsin Ave.): C’mon down! You could be the next contestant on “The Price is Right!” Whether you’re chosen to play a game or you celebrate from your seat, fun is sure to be had during this 8 p.m., all-ages live show. Stroll over to pabsttheatergroup.com for tickets.
March 1—Eggs & Economics at The Fitzgerald (1119 N. Marshall St.) The Wisconsin LGBT Chamber of Commerce serves up this rise-and-shine event to help keep your business operating smoothly. The 8-9:30 a.m. breakfast discussion delves into economic trends, business strategies, and community impact via keynote speaker Dennis Winters (chief economist at the Wisconsin Department of Workforce Development). Tickets start at $60 but see wislgbtchamber.com for more.
March 2—“On Your Feet: The Story of Emilio and Gloria Estefan” at Marcus Center for the Performing Arts(929 N. Water St.): Celebrate the music, story and love of this talented couple before the one-night-only production moves on to another city. The sensational musical features decades of hits, including “Rhythm is Gonna Get You,” “1,2,3,” “Coming Out of the Dark” and so many others. Conga over to marcuscenter.org for tickets.
March 2—"Fortune Feimster: Live, Laugh, Love” at Riverside Theater (116 W. Wisconsin Ave.): Not only is Fortune Feimster a favorite with the LGBTQ+ community, but her hilarious, matter-of-fact persona has struck a chord with comedy lovers from coast to coast. Don’t miss her latest tour when the celebrated comedian returns to Cream City. Nab seats via pabsttheatergroup.com.
March 4—Service Industry Night at Pop (124 W. National Ave.): If you work in the service industry, Monday night is likely the weekend for you. Celebrate with drink and shot specials, food discounts, a beer bust, free darts and more. The 5-11 p.m. party occurs every Monday, so call your work buddies and check out the city’s newest hot spot.
March 5—Project Q Youth Drop-In at Milwaukee LGBT Community Center (315 W. Court St.): If you have a young LGBTQ+ family member seeking peers, a sense of community and more, this 3-6 p.m. drop-in might be the answer. A safe space for those 13 and older, the social group helps kid form friendships with one another, exercise creativity and more. The Project Q Drop-In occurs every Tuesday and Thursday. See mkelgbt.org for additional information.
Have a question for Ruthie? Want to share an event with her? Contact Ruthie at DearRuthie@ShepEx.com.
