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Dear Ruthie,
Every weekend, my sister visits rummage and estate sales, secondhand and antique stores and pawn shops. She has more clothes than she’ll ever be able to wear, her home is near hoarder status and her car is packed with junk bought but never brought into the house.
After spending all her money on crap, she had the nerve to approach my husband and me for money. She can’t pay her rent or utilities and is actually a month behind on things. I’m having a hard time helping her financially when she clearly could afford such things if she stopped spending money on junk. I’m torn between helping her and seeing her fall further into debt. Not sure what to do.
Help!
Loaner Lynne
Dear Loaner,
As a shopaholic who can’t turn down a sale, even I have to admit your sis needs to take her spending down a notch.
You don’t mention if this is the first time she’s come to you for financial help, so I’m going to assume that it is. You also seem to think you have two options: Pay all her debt or don’t give that broad a penny. Might I suggest a third option? Pay a portion of her debt with the understanding that she pays you back in monthly installments. This will help her out, ease your guilt and teach her a hard-learned lesson. Maybe pay her late rent and let her worry about the utilities—which she can likely work out with the powers that be.
Be firm in letting her know this is a one-time deal, and that if she doesn’t curb her reckless spending, she’ll be on her own in the future.
Ruthie’s Social Calendar
October 12—2023 Cream City Foundation Business Equality Luncheon at The Pfister Hotel (424 E. Wisconsin Ave.): Celebrate LGBTQ+ equality in Southeastern Wisconsin workplaces when you attend this popular event. The 11:30 a.m. to 1 p.m. lunch includes a keynote speaker in addition to the opportunity to mix and mingle with city’s movers and shakers. See www.creamcityfdn.org for tickets.
October 13 – Paula Poundstone at The Pabst Theater (144 E. Wells St.): A great night is sure to be had with the one-of-a-kind comedy of Paula Poundstone. See why her dry wit and observational take on society keep Paula one of the country’s favorite funny people when you nab tickets at www.pabsttheatergroup.com.
October 14—Super Sale at MAC/Miller and Campbell Costume Service (907 S. First St.): Drop by this 10 a.m. to 3 p.m. sale, and nab all the costumes, makeup and wigs to make your Halloween costume one for the books. Plan to arrive early. The best pieces are gone quickly!
October 14—“Bosom Buddies” at La Cage Niteclub (801 S. Second St.): Fall is in the air when Maple Veneer and Karen Valentine take to the stage for a change-of-pace variety show. Stop by for a pre-show cocktail at 4 p.m. before the 5:30 p.m. extravaganza.
October 14—Big Night Out at Potawatomi Casino Hotel (1721 W. Canal St.): The team at Milwaukee LGBT Community hosts this annual bash that’s sure to be the highlight of your autumn. The theme this year is Halloween Masquerade, so wear your masked best to the 6 p.m. fundraiser. Featuring food, drinks, a silent auction, a burlesque revue and more, the party requires a $75 ticket which can be found at www.mkelgbt.org.
October 15—Milwaukee Out of the Darkness Walk at Veterans Park (1010 N. Lincoln Drive): The Wisconsin Chapter of the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention hosts this annual fundraiser. Join the 10 a.m. walk that’s truly a journey of remembrance, hope and support. See www.afsp.org for registration and more.
October 17 – Opening night Disney’s Aladdin at Marcus Performing Arts Center (929 N. Water St.): Your Broadway wishes come true in this newly produced musical from the minds of “The Lion King” and “Frozen.” Featuring plenty of toe-tapping fun for the entire family, the magical production wraps up October 22, so stop by www.marcuscenter.org for dates, show times and tickets.
Have a question for Ruthie? Want to share an event with her? Contact Ruthie at DearRuthie@ShepEx.com.
