Dear Ruthie is sponsored by C3 Designs. C3 Designs offers a variety of services performed in-house, including custom jewelry design, jewelry and watch repair, appraisal, pearl and bead stringing, engraving and flip guards. You can read past columns here.
Dear Ruthie,
Lately my partner of 28 years has been accusing me of being angry and rude. He has no patience with me or anything and he goes off over the smallest things. When he does this it’s like I don’t know him.
He forgets things constantly, repeats himself all the time and says can’t sleep but then fall asleep at the dinner table. We’ve talked about things and he agrees that there is an issue at hand. We’re just not sure if it’s old age, a change in his overall level of patience or a combination of things.
I think it might be the combination of the medications he’s on, but I also fear it could be something else such as the start of dementia or something even more serious. I know you’re not a doctor but as Milwaukee’s relationship guru, I’m interested in hearing what you think of our situation.
Stay Cool,
Confused Karl
Dear Confused,
I’m Milwaukee’s relationship guru? Damn. I better get to work! There are a lot of lonely hearts out there! Thanks, sugar, you flatter me, but let’s get to the issue at hand.
Regarding your relationship, it sounds like you’re doing fine. You clearly care about each other. You’re concerned with his health, and you’re keeping an eye on the communication between the two of you and your overall rapport.
Speaking of communication, it’s good to hear that your honey agrees with your concerns. That makes things easier. You don’t mention whether he’s open to going to a doctor, but I’m guessing that he is since he acknowledges a problem. Because I’m not a doctor, seeing one should be your first step.
There is a plethora (dare I say “shitload?”) of things that could be going on with your honey bunny. It could be as simple as the combo of meds he’s downing, lack of sleep or emotional stress from the changes going on in the world around us. On the flip side, and I know you hate to hear it, darlin’, it could something more serious such as the onset of diabetes or chemical imbalances. This is why he needs to see a doctor asap.
Go with him, take things step by step and you’ll continue down the path of love, happiness and success that you as a couple are accustomed to. Thanks for thinking of me. Let me know how things work out if you feel comfortable doing so.
Dear Ruthie,
With the bars opening, I’m feeling overwhelmed about the threat of COVID. It’s almost paralyzing. My friends want to hit the bars, but I’m freaking out. I want to go, meet guys, dance and have fun, but I don’t know. Am I being paranoid? Maybe I just need to go out, get drunk and get over it.
Whatcha Think?
Wish-Washy
Dear Washy,
You’re not being paranoid. The Corona Virus is very much still a part of our lives, and it’s not to be treated lightly. Your concerns are justified, responsible and mature.
While Milwaukee bar- and restaurant-owners are taking precautions and following city guidelines to keep patrons safe, the ultimate decision to go out is up to you. If you don’t feel comfortable, don’t go! If your friends don’t understand that tell them to go screw themselves.
When you’re ready to dip your toe in the Cream City social scene again, consider a spot with outdoor seating. Choose a place that encourages social distancing and limits the number of patron’s per Milwaukee guidelines. If you feel uneasy when out, simply leave. Your health and contentment are key, so do what you have to do. You won’t regret it.
This is all said assuming you’re dealing with life as well as can be expected during the pandemic; you’re taking care of yourself, eating right, maintain relationships, etc. If your fear is paralyzing you to the point it grossly interferes with your life (your job, your relationships, your physical wellbeing), then you should see a professional therapist to learn how to best cope with your fears.
Ask Ruthie a question at DearRuthie@Shepex.com. Follow her on Instagram @ruthiekeester and Facebook at Dear Ruthie. Don’t miss her new game show, “Dear Ruthie’s Bar Wars” on www.twitch.tv/dearruthie, and check out her hilarious drag reality competition “Camp Wannakiki,” on YouTube.
Dear Ruthie is sponsored by C3 Designs. You can read past columns here.
