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Dear Ruthie,
My husband and I adopted an adorable little girl. She was a toddler when she came into our lives and will be entering first grade next year.
From the get-go my in-laws told us they’d pay for her education through high school. We were thrilled over the news of this generous gift. As we began considering schools, we were informed that my in-laws already picked a school and that they’d only pay tuition if she went to that exact school. If we want her to go elsewhere, then we were on our own for tuition.
On one hand, I understand their thought process, but I also think there are some unnecessary expectations associated with their gift. We actually want to send her to a different school, so this all came as a shock. We’re not totally sure what to do.
What do you think?
Baffled Brandon
Dear Baffled,
Be baffled no more! Ruthie is here! Hmmm … what do I think? I think you should make your daughter’s education, growth and overall wellbeing your priority. Decisions regarding her education should stem from that, and not from a monetary gift.
You don’t state the differences between the two schools, but clearly there’s something about one that puts it at the top of your list. If you truly believe that’s the school that’s best for your kiddo, then go with it.
You and your hubby should sit your in-laws down and explain why you believe this school is best for her. Note that you appreciate their gift, and you’ll never forget their kindness, but that you feel you’ve found the best school for her. Thank them again and let them know that you’ll pay her tuition at this school. No reason for hurt feelings—you’re simply doing what you feel is best for your daughter.
Ruthie’s Social Calendar
September 29—John Oliver Live in Concert at Miller High Life Theater (500 W. Kilbourn Ave.): HBO’s leftwing superstar hits the Milwaukee stage with his hilarious take on life, love and, of course, politics. See why the Emmy-winner is taking the country by storm when you purchase tickets via www.pabsttheatergroup.
September 29—Luci’s Inferno: An AfroBeats Dance Party at This Is It(418 E. Wells St.): Back by popular demand, the second installment of this dance party will surely hit capacity. Celebrate the hottest in Afrobeats/Dancehall music with DJ Trunk Bussa when the rave starts at 10 p.m.
September 30—Makers Market at Stonewood Village (17700 W. Capitol Drive): More than 60 vendors sell their wares in Brookfield’s charming Stonewood Village during this 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. marketplace. You’ll also find live music, food trucks and more. A great way to celebrate fall, the marketplace only lasts one day, so you don’t want to miss it.
September 30—Dining with the Divas at Hamburger Mary’s (730 S. Fifth St.): See why Mary’s is voted Milwaukee’s Best Drag Venue when you attend this wild and crazy night. Two shows (6:30 and 9 p.m.) make it easy for you to celebrate when you want. Stop by www.hamburgermarys.com/mke for reservations.
October 1—Closing Night Three Other Sisters at Kenilworth 508 Theatre(1925 E. Kenilworth Pl.): Three sisters in love with the same man? What could go wrong? Find out before this intriguing show closes. Purchase tickets to the Theatre Gigante production viaeventbrite.com.
October 1-3—“Coco Peru Is Bitter, Bothered & Beyond” at Zanies Comedy Club (1548 N, Wells St., Chicago): One of the greatest storytellers of our time blows into Windy City with this hilarious new show! The legendary Coco Peru shares her thoughts on the insanity of the past few years. Delivering laughs, heartfelt moments and memories to be made, Coco’s show is not to be missed. See www.chicago.zanies.com for tickets and show times.
October 3—Banned Books Giveaway at Hedberg Public Library (316 S. Main St., Janesville): Stop by Library Park between 4 and 7 p.m. for a free banned or challenged book. Talk with librarians and likeminded folks concerned about how books unite while censorship divides.
Have a question for Ruthie? Want to share an event with her? Contact Ruthie at DearRuthie@ShepEx.com
