1 of 2
Buffy the Wing Slayer from Snack Boys
2 of 2
Ice Cream Sammy from Snack Boys
There is nothing quite like Snack Boys in Milwaukee. It’s the choose-your-own-adventure book of the restaurant world, transporting you back to your tweens with countless puns, after-school snacks and naughty jokes your mother would have scoffed at. It’s full of the kinds of things 12 year olds like, only now everyone’s old enough to drink without having to hide it.
I could write some deep thinkpiece about how Snack Boys is a response to the current political climate of division and how it’s being embraced because people are yearning for comfort and a time when the world was a less scary place. But really, that’s too deep. I wouldn’t want to be a buzzkill. What I imagine actually happened: The owners all got together one night at one of their bars and talked about Burt Reynolds, reminisced about their favorite childhood snacks (munchies, you know), and dreamed up a restaurant that made them all giddy.
However it came about, Snack Boys has struck a chord. It helps that the owners all have earned their culinary chops in Milwaukee: John Revord owns Boone & Crockett, Mitch Ciohon owns Taco Moto (formerly Gypsy Taco) and Shay Linkus was the chef at Vanguard. These three restaurateurs have taken their collective food and alcohol knowledge and distilled it into one slightly insane package—and not the one a naked Burt Reynolds is covering with his hands in the larger-than-life mural on the back wall.
The only real theme across the food menu is nostalgia. Many of the couple dozen or so rotating small plates are clearly inspired from longtime favorites: potato chips and dip, deviled eggs, bologna sandwiches and chicken wings. There are plenty of meat-heavy snacks, a raw bar selection and a section called “Veggie” which is far from health food.
Strangely, the dish that won the night was cheese fries ($5). Something so simple can be revelatory when done right and these were spot on. There wasn’t a hint of grease, only crisp, light, skin-on spuds, showered with a mountain of finely shredded Pleasant Ridge Reserve cheese and served with a heavenly aioli. Add the seven-year-aged cheddar queso sauce ($3) on the side for dipping, and then proceed to dip everything else you order into it, too.
Cheese Fries from Snack Boys
Another hit was a lobster and chicken stock ramen bowl called “Send Noodz” ($8). The price and ingredients vary, but on my visit it included julienned Spam which provided a salty, porky counterpoint to the rich deep brown broth. A pile of bouncy ramen noodles was mounded out of the bowl, though the cured egg was absent. Bok choy and shiitake mushrooms added a necessary reprieve from noodles and pork. It was one of the most generously sized dishes of the night, and certainly more than just a snack.
A fried bologna sandwich ($5), slider sized and on a bun, was messy and greasy in all the right ways. If you’ve only ever experienced bologna as Oscar Mayer, think of this as the latest charcuterie trend instead. Thick slices are griddled and then topped with Dijonnaise, Taleggio cheese, spicy giardiniera and crushed potato chips for a satisfying crunch, just like you used to do when you were little.
Speaking of potato chips, you can get a whole mess of perfect homemade chips—they really do potatoes well here—in the Chips Toodaloo ($4). They’re served sticking upright out of a boat of thick onion dip, which is definitely better than your great aunt made in the ’70s.
This is a new restaurant, and a busy one, so there were bound to be a couple misses. The chicken fried confit chicken ($6) in a pool of buffalo-like sauce had undercooked batter and some chicken so overcooked it was paste rather than muscle. The What’s Up Turkey Butt ($5) had great flavor in the barbecue vinaigrette, but the fried turkey tails were barely crispy at all. A tweak in preparation would easily make both dishes fantastic.
As you’ve probably guessed, the fun doesn’t stop on the cocktail menu. Slushy machines behind the bar pump out various delicious drinks, like the Kobra Fangerdong ($11). What that name means, I have no idea, but the mix of Plantation Pineapple rum, crème de cacao and passionfruit syrup is like sipping frozen SweeTarts. Most drinks are sweet and tiki-inspired, including the Sybaris...The Drink ($9) and the Just Follow Your Nose ($10) which is like if Toucan Sam was an alcoholic, plus Pop Rocks.
When you go to Snack Boys, take your time and graze under the warm glow of neon signs and fish tank lights, taking in the random whiffs of burning incense. While it may help you forget about the world outside the restaurant, it’s what it will remind you of—spending time in grandma’s basement, bag lunches, Saturday morning cartoons—that’s the important part.
