Dear Ruthie,
I am not looking for sex. Let me repeat: I am not looking for sex. However, I am looking for a few friends I can go to dinner with, see movies and plays with and the like. I need a group of friends to hang out with... not to date or sleep with.
I heard that it’s hard to make friends once you get older, and damn... that statement was true! I moved to Milwaukee recently, and at the age of 58, it seems nearly impossible to make new friends. When I approach guys, they think I’m interested in them sexually, when I just need a new buddy or two. Any ideas?
Let me know, Friendless but Fun
Dear Funny Guy,
Too bad you’re not looking for sex because knocking boots is a great way to meet people... assuming, of course no one is tied up or blindfolded. Don’t get me started.
I’m sure you’re a hoot and a holler to paint the town with, so take a bit of pressure off yourself. You might be trying too hard. I’d suggest you try volunteering. Help set up an event, work at a food bank, volunteer your time and you’ll meet other like-minded people also interested in friendship.
You might also try joining a book club, becoming active in a local online community of sorts or even offer to help one of the city’s many theaters. These are all great ways to expand your social circle, my friend! (See that? See what I did there?)
Dear Ruthie,
How and when do I know if my time at the casino is turning into a gambling problem?Thanks, In the Red
Dear Red,
While lots of folks enjoy a good time at the slots or blackjack table, gambling addictions are problems for many. You didn’t give me much to go on, but the fact that you’re asking if you have a problem concerns me.
Go see a professional who specializes in gambling addiction and talk things through. This person can help you address your concerns and get a handle on the situation. A good therapist will also create a therapy plan for you (if needed), addressing the issue now before things get out of control.
Dear Ruthie,
Why are gay guys so critical? This seems to be getting worse in our community. Worst of all, it’s not the young kids, it’s the older guys always making fun of other men’s hair, clothes and such. I’ve had it. It’s stupid! Have you noticed this?
Sincerely, Annoyed
Dear Annoying,
God, your email is terrible. And don’t get me started on your lousy spelling and syntax. And what’s with the exclamation points? (Insert eye roll here.)
Sorry, sugar. I can’t say that I’ve noticed any more reads from our community than normal, but that doesn’t mean such behavior isn’t on the rise. If you want to put an end to it (at least where you’re concerned), you’ve got to grab the gossiper by the tea leaves and let him have it. Tell the negative Nancy to cool it with the shade. Let him (or her) know you don’t appreciate that sort of talk and put an end to it. While this may not improve any nastiness spreading through our community, it will reduce it in your life.
Ruthie’s Social Calendar
Sept. 12—Nick Offerman at The Riverside Theater (116 W. Wisconsin Ave.): Star of “Parks & Recreation,” author, actor, funny man and one of America’s favorite daddy bears, Nick Offerman struts his hilarious stuff into Milwaukee once again. Join the self-described American humorist during this 7:30 p.m. one-man show that’s sure to have you laughing into the weekend. Stop by pabsttheater.org for tickets that start at $39.75.
Sept. 12—“An Evening with Joan Rivers & Friends” at Saint Kate Hotel (139 E. Kilbourn Ave.): I don my best Joan Rivers drag to host this fast and funny evening of celebrity impressions. Join me and some of the city’s top drag performers as we invade The Arc Theater at the Saint Kate hotel. A $10 door charge gets you into the 8 p.m. show featuring Nova D’Vine, Lenda Jo, Shawna Love and Miss Birdee. Arrive early and enjoy the gorgeous bar and art gallery at the Saint Kate. Be sure to take advantage of the in-ground parking lot for a fun, fuss-free night.
Sept. 13—Milwaukee Coffee Connection at Milwaukee PBS (1036 N. Eighth St.): Talk about an event to “network!” Stop by the local PBS station between 8-9 a.m. to meet like-minded business owners and connect with other professionals in the LGBTQ community. Hosted by the Wisconsin LGBT Chamber of Commerce, this rise-and-shine happy hour is a great way to make new business contacts, meet new friends and start the day off with a smile.
Sept. 14—“Bosom Buddies: A Broad’s Guide to Broadway” at LaCage Niteclub (801 S. Second St.): Happy hours aren’t just for weekdays anymore! Join Karen Valentine and Maple Veneer for a new show that salutes the best of the Great White Way. Live singers, drag numbers, drink specials and more round out the 4-8 p.m. event (show at 5 p.m.). What a great way to celebrate showtunes and Saturday!
Sept. 15—Packer Sunday Funday at Woody’s (1579 S. Second St.): It’s the first noon game of the Packer season, so nab your seat early at the city’s favorites LGBTQ sports bar. Between the multiple monitors, touchdown shots, free halftime buffet, beer bust and friendly crowd, Woody’s always host the most popular game day afternoon in town.
Sept. 17—Project Q at the Milwaukee LGBT Community Center (1110 N. Market St.): Know a local LGBTQ youth who might need a new friend or two? This 3 p.m. support group might help. Movies, games and art activities as well as structured programs such as lectures, seminars and discussions on social issues and self-identity concerns have made this one of the longest running social services in our community. Contact the center at mkelgbt.org with questions about this free service.
Ask Ruthie a question or share your events with her at dearruthie@shepex.com. Follow her on Instagram @ruthiekeester and Facebook at Dear Ruthie. Watch, like, subscribe and share her reality show, “Camp Wannakiki Season 2,” on YouTube today!
