Dear Ruthie,
I’ve been dating a guy for almost five weeks, and I’m questioning if he’s abusive or not. He hasn’t hit me or done anything to harm me physically, but he has called me “stupid” and a “dumb fuck” a few times.
He loses patience with me super-fast. He also loses his patience with waiters and goes off on others in the service industry. This is pretty embarrassing, and if I try to calm him down or don’t side with him, then I’m a “dumb ass” to and he goes off on me.
When things are good, they’re great. When things are bad, I feel hurt. He apologizes after his outbursts, but that doesn’t always make it better. He wants me to move in soon. Part of me thinks this is a mistake; part of me thinks I’ll understand him better. My friends say that’s dumb. What do you think?
Thanks,
Question Mark
Dear Mark,
I’m not going to call you dumb, honey. It sounds like you’re getting enough of that already and secondly, you had the good sense to reach to out to Dear Ruthie!
You’ve been with this ass pipe for a few weeks. Get the hell out while the getting is good. You know, in your heart, that this relationship isn’t right, and moving in with this jackhole isn’t going to make life easier, hon. Tell that crap-tacular guy to hit the road! (How’s THAT for name calling?)
There’s an old adage that suggests that the way your partner treats a waiter or waitress is the way that partner will treat you in a few years. Take that advice, sugar! Call it quits and move on before his abuse intensifies.
Call a few of your amigos and have some fun this week instead! Check out the list of weekly happenings and enjoy life with those who support and love you…not those who call you names and increase the stress in your life.
UPCOMING EVENTS:
Jan. 13: Kink! at Hybrid Lounge (707 E. Brady St.): Leather, and latex, and fur…oh, my! Let your fetish flag fly high because the gang at Hybrid is blacking out the windows for the return of its most popular event…Kink! Join the 9 p.m. party by dressing as naughty or as nice as you want. A DJ, dancing, coat check and what’s being billed as “male entertainment,” make this sexy soiree a night to remember.
Jan. 14: The Museum of Advice at Woodland Pattern Book Center (720 E. Locust St.): Back in August, local performance artist and poet, Anja Notanja Sieger, created The Advice Tent where more than 400 folks submitted questions to a panel of advice-givers. Now, Sieger has taken those questions and put them into a book and museum display. What sort of problems are Milwaukeeans facing? Which questions made the panel of experts crack up? Find out during this 2 p.m. free reading, reception and talk back.
Jan. 14: The Rocky Horror Picture Show 39th Anniversary at Oriental Theatre (2230 N. Farwell Ave.): Guess what? The Oriental Theatre holds the record for longest continuous showing of Rocky Horror in the country! The kids at Sensual Daydreams are celebrating with their onstage show, uncensored movie, costume contest and more. Do the time warp again during the marvelous midnight showing. Tickets go for $10 a seat.
Jan. 15: Drag Queen Story Time at The Waxwing (1800 E. North Ave.): Local drag queens don their reading glasses for this kiddie jamboree that offers stories and songs of diversity and acceptance. Free and open to the public, the 11:15 to 11:45 a.m. program offers a 15% discount to the Waxwing gift shop to anyone donating to Courage MKE. Possible donations include toothbrushes, toothpaste, deodorant, shampoo and the like. Let’s get ready to have some family-friendly fun, drag queen style!
Jan. 15: Brunch with the Brunchettes at Hamburger Mary’s (730 S. Fifth St.): The new Hamburger Mary’s complex updates its all-you-can-eat brunch buffet with a noon drag show! Join the Brunchettes for a fast, funny and fabulous Sunday show that’s sure to keep you smiling into the workweek. Call 414-488-2555 for reservations.
Jan. 17: Best of Milwaukee Party at Turner Hall Ballroom (1034 N. Fourth St.): The readers of Shepherd Express voted in more than 250 categories regarding their favorite people, places and businesses. Come see who the winners are and rub elbows with the top of the Cream City crop. You’ll also sample incredible appetizers, enjoy cash bars and more for the $12 door charge (Save $2 and order tickets at shepherdtickets.com.) Not an event to be missed, the night kicks off at 6 p.m. (doors open at 5:30 p.m.) and wraps up at 9 p.m.
Want to share an event with Ruthie? Need her advice on a situation? Email DearRuthie@Shepex.com. Be sure to follow her Facebook (Ruthie Keester) and Twitter (@DearRuthie).
