Photo via Human Rights Campaign hrc.org
National Coming Out Day - Human Rights Campaign
This year’s Coming Out Day was unlike any other. Perhaps it was the overture just days prior of PridetoberFest that put people in the mood. Held under extraordinary circumstances of the pandemic, the event was graced with the finest summer-like weather one would wish for a traditional June PrideFest (and better than many I can recall).
Coming Out Day also happened to be Indigenous Peoples’ Day, a federal holiday, cascades of celebratory messages filled social media. It seemed everyone was posting them. There was one from Sen. Tammy Baldwin and a Coming Out Day Proclamation issued by Gov. Tony Evers. VP Kamala Harris posted a group photo with other lawmakers. Someone posted the classic Keith Haring image of a figure exiting an open door.
President Joe Biden himself made the most extraordinary Coming Out Day statement, saying, “Today and every day, I want every member of the LGBTQ+ community to know that you are loved and accepted just the way you are—regardless of whether or not you've come out. Bullying and harassment— particularly of young transgender Americans and LGBTQ+ people of color—still abounds, diminishing our national character. We must continue to stand together against these acts of hate, and stand up to protect the rights, opportunities, physical safety, and mental health of LGBTQ+ people everywhere.
“From defeating discriminatory bills to passing the Equality Act, we have more work to do to ensure that every American can live free of fear, harassment, and discrimination because of who they are or whom they love.”
Still Astounding
As a gay boomer, such a message is simply astounding, proving the progress LGBTQs both activists and those who just live their out and proud lives have wrought. For today’s generation, the one that has most benefited by the efforts of its activist predecessors, it may not seem such a big deal. Naive as that is, it’s satisfying as well. True, as Biden notes, there’s work to be done, but certainly coming out is far easier now than it has ever been before.
The changing times and attitudes also find resonance in such stalwartly and toxically heterosexual institutions as the NFL. LGBTQ people found reassurance when Carl Nassib came out earlier this year. Just this week NFL coach Jon Gruden resigned just hours after his leaked emails revealed his blatant homophobia (directed at Black gay NFL hopeful Michael Sam), misogyny and racism.
Meanwhile, during the course of Coming Out Day, the dreary weather briefly broke after a good dousing of rain. When the clouds parted, rainbows (and double rainbows) appeared over the city, prompting another wave of celebratory social media posts full of photos of the LGBTQ symbol. There’s nothing like validation.
But for all the rainbows and lofty presidential remarks, however inspiring, for me the most moving remark of the day was a social media post by a friend, Rahmil, who wrote, “I came out when I was 17. I came out to my family when I was 20. It wasn’t until I was 22 that I was comfortable with who I was. So it took a while but I made it. You know, being sure of myself and all that. To this day, I don’t give a f*ck who is for it or not. You don’t have to be with the program. Show me the same respect I show you. That’s it.”
