Dear Ruthie,
Let’s see if you can answer this, Ruthie. Middle-age guy here who needs to firm up his ass. I’m getting that droopy, silky-feeling ass that old guys get, and I hate it. Any tips to firm things up?
—Droopy Drawers
Dear Droopy,
As anyone who has ever seen me in a bikini can attest, I’m not into physical fitness. I don’t work out, stretch, twist, turn, bike, hike, nada. After all, if God wanted me to bend over and touch the floor, he would have put diamonds, cigarettes and little bottles of vodka on the ground. Needless to say, I’m not the girl to answer your question. Happy now? You got me.
That said, I thought I’d reach out to Milwaukee’s booty specialist, Billy Lewis. Fully certified in core conditioning and body sculpting, Billy has been involved in the fitness arena for more than seven years. I asked Billy for his secrets to firming up the tush.
“Squats are an excellent way to improve your gluteus maximus,” says Billy. “Varying the width of your feet will change the emphasis of the exercise; as you move your feet further apart, you’ll feel it in your hips and butt.” Billy also suggests an exercise called Butterfly Bridges. (How cute!) “They’re a great way to tighten and shape your rear, and they can be done anywhere,” he explains. “Laying on your back, press the bottoms of your feet together, bringing your feet close to your bum. Slowly raise your hips, simultaneously bringing your knees together with a squeeze. Lower the hips; opening the knees—simulating butterfly wings.”
The butt expert says that the more you elevate your hips and the closer the heels of your feet are to your keester, you’ll increase the burn. “Give a squeeze at the end of every set for a minimum of 10 seconds,” adds Billy.
When all else fails, talk to a trainer in person. Want to work out with Billy yourself? Want to schedule a consultation? Contact this Cream City fitness pro at billlewis73@hotmail.com!
UPCOMING EVENTS
July 5: Star-Spangled Spectacular at Hamburger Mary’s (730 S. Fifth St.): Milwaukee’s latest drag sensation, Pagan Holladay, hosts this red, white and blue celebration. Grab your Uncle Sam’s best and enjoy the 8 p.m. fun featuring the naughty Gluttoni Sinn, lovely Nova D’Vine and way-sexy Tod Alan. Call the burger haven at 414-488-2555 for reservations to the one-night-only event.
July 8: New Pride Alive at Joannes Park (Doty St. and S. Baird St., Green Bay): Keep the pride love flowing with this Northeast Wisconsin festival. Party with the boys and girls from Green Bay with live entertainment, food, beverages and more. What a great reason for a road trip! Explore the social scene in Green Bay, meet new friends and celebrate! For a lineup of entertainers, volunteer opportunities, maps and more, see newpridealive.com. The fest runs noon to 10 p.m.
July 9: Show Tune Sunday at Club Charlie’s (320 E. Menomonee St.): Life is a cabaret and this Sunday Funday proves it! In addition to the music, hilarious videos and cute bartenders, you’ll find great food and beverages to whet your whistle. The mingling, laughing and dancing are all free during this 2-7 p.m. sing-a-along.
July 10: Full Moon Hike at the Ice Age Trail at Holy Hill (via UWM University Recreation-Outdoor Pursuits, 3409 N. Downer Ave.): A “full moon” stroll in the woods might sound naughty to some of you, but this exciting outdoor adventure is actually a great way for all ages to experience nature! The moon illuminates this incredible hike, hosted by the team at UW-Milwaukee’s Outdoor Pursuits. For more on the 9 p.m. excursion, see uwm.edu. There you’ll find more on the $10 ticket, which includes transportation to the Ice Age Trail, headlamps and more.
July 11: Testing Tuesday at This Is It (418 E. Wells St.): Knowledge is power so know your HIV/AIDS status with free testing at this popular Cathedral Square bar. You’ll also find complimentary STD tests, information on PEP and PrEP, safe-sex kits and more starting at 9 p.m.
Want to share an event with Ruthie? Need her advice on a situation? Email dearruthie@shepex.com.
