Dear Ruthie,
I went on a first date with a guy who had the worst breath in the history of human dental work (or lack thereof). Should I give him a second chance or move on?
(Signed) Grossed Out
Dear Out & About,
Icky poo poo! While putrid breath can be pretty off putting, tell him to put his money where his mouth is and see if a second date doesn’t clear things up. Could be the poor guy swallowed a rancid hoagie or accidentally picked his teeth with a cadaver’s toenail. If this breath could peel the skin off a potato, you might want to grab some Tic Tacs and find yourself another guy.
Dear Ruthie,
I can’t believe I’m writing into an advice column, but what the hey, hey? Tell me, would you put up with a boyfriend who forgot your anniversary every year for the past 3 years? What am I doing wrong?
(Signed) Forget Me Not
Dear Forgotten,
What the what? He’s either lazy, stupid or just plain ol’ forgetful. Make it a point to remind him next time by taking the horse by the reins and planning a special night for the two of you. If you make anniversary plans with/for him, he’ll better remember next time and realize how important the day is to you. If not, he may just be a lost cause in this area. You’ve clearly loved the guy for 3 years, so keep on loving his lazy, stupid, forgetful ass, and chalk this all up to something he’s just not that good at. Then, focus on the things he’s great at instead. Like… uhm… he’s great at forgetting things!
Dear Ruthie,
Why is it so hard to find true love?(Signed) Lonely Girl
Dear Girl, Because that’s what makes it so special, honey.
Ruthie’s Social Calendar
July 11—Opening Day Bastille Days at Cathedral Square (520 E. Wells St.): Ooh la la! Grab your beret, a bottle of wine and kick up your heels with the cancan because the coolest festival in Cream City is upon us once again. From the food and drinks to the shopping and entertainment, it’s one street fair that puts Milwaukee summer on the map. For more on the fest, sashay over to the events area of easttown.com.
July 11—Drag Roulette at Hamburger Mary’s (730 S. Fifth St.): The pink and purple burger palace is at it again with this new installment to its weekly lineup. Drag performers spin the wheel to see what genre of music they must perform... and then wait as the DJ selects a song at random. Come for the burgers, stay for the audience participation and relish the craziness. Eat, drink and be “Mary” with this 7:30 p.m. show.
July 12—Grand Opening After Party at Saint Kate Arts Hotel (139 E. Kilbourn Ave.): Come to Saint Kate’s to see what Milwaukee is talking about! Unlike any hotel you’ve seen before, this gorgeous space celebrates art in a sophisticated yet friendly environment that must be experienced to be fully appreciated. If you didn’t nab a ticket to the grand opening party swing by at 9 p.m. for the after-bash, free and open to the public. Live entertainment, cash bars, art tours and more make it a night to remember. Be sure to check out the gallery as well as the theater—featuring my 10 p.m. show, “A Night with Stars.” I host the free show as Joan Rivers, and spotlight incredible impersonations of Cher, Tina Turner, Lady Gaga, Divine and others. See you there!
July 14—Sunday Funday on Brady Street (Brady St. and N. Arlington Place): Mix up your Sunday routine with a visit to this art and farmers market at one of the city’s favorite hot spots. Check out the produce from local growers as well as art, crafts, music and more created by Milwaukee’s best. Make an afternoon of it, because the Sunday Funday runs noon to 4 p.m.
July 14—Sunday Showtunes at This Is It! (418 E. Wells St.): Like Broadway, booze and boys? Well, this is the event for you! Swing by the popular watering hole for a 3 p.m. afternoon of songs from your favorites shows, movies and more. Karen Valentine hosts the fun with some of the friendliest bartenders in town. Ask about the drink specials because there’s always something great on tap at This Is It!
July 14—Diana Ross at the Riverside Theater (116 W. Wisconsin Ave.): One of the most successful recording artists of our time brings her landmark talent to Brew City with a once-in-a-lifetime concert. See pabsttheater.org for more on the 7:30 p.m. show, including tickets that run $55 to $135. Then settle in and enjoy the history, glamor and exuberance Ms. Ross brings to the stage.
July 16—Wisconsin LGBT Chamber’s Coffee Connection at Adoption Choice, Inc. (500 W. Silver Spring Drive): It’s that time of the month again! Time to meet some new folks, say hi to familiar faces and enjoy a free cup of coffee! The LGBT Chamber of Commerce hosts the monthly get-together that helps you meet like-minded business owners. Cheers!
Ask Ruthie a question or share your events with her at dearruthie@shepex.com. Follow her on Instagram @ruthiekeester and Facebook at Dear Ruthie.
