Police Follies
- According to an Associated Press report, alleged harassment by cops insmall-town Jericho, Ark., got so bad that the fire chief went tocourt twice in the same day in August to complain about speed traps. Thechief's charge angered the seven officers attending the hearing, and acourtroom scuffle ensued. The chief ended up being shot in the back andhospitalized. WMC-TV reported that the shooter had not been charged, but thatan arrest warrant had been issued for the chief, who was then fired by themayor. The Crittenden County sheriff hasdisbanded the police force, and all firefighters have resigned.
- George Vera, who weighs nearly 600 pounds, was booked into jail in Houston in August and wasin custody for more than 24 hours before he casually informed cops that theyhad missed finding the 9 mm handgun and two clips that were hidden in his rollsof fat.
The Entrepreneurial Spirit!
- Questionable Business Model: In September, in downtown Longview, Wash.,a 23-year-old man held up a sign offering to be kicked in the groin for $5. Hemade one sale before police, acting on a complaint, made him move on.
- Fierce Competition: (1) Police in Broome, Western Australia, reportedin September that a five-year feud between two rival camel-ride vendors in theCable Beach resort area had erupted again, this time involving allegations ofcamel theft and tossed camel dung. (2) In July, as the legal brothel businessdeclined precipitously in Germany,owners adopted gimmicks like offers of free shoeshines and discounts for retirees.However, when several brothels began offering flat-rate plans (based on therestaurant model of all-you-can-eat), local officials cracked down, judging theoffer as a little too excessive.
- Questionable Products: (1) The Spanish toy-maker Berjuan has introduceda doll that suckles from a halter worn by young girls who want to mimic theirbreastfeeding mothers. The Bebe Gloton is not expected to be available in the United Statesuntil 2010, but it is being shown worldwide on YouTube. (2) The Braziliancompany PetSmiling has created a prototype DoggieLoverDoll in three sizes. Asthe name suggests, the doll is designed as a "mountable,"anatomically correct sex partner for male dogs. It was introduced at the PetSouth America fair in Sao Pauloin July, according to Associated Press photos.
Side Effects
Malcolm Darby, 70, awoke from surgeryfollowing a stroke in Oakham, England, lastyear to find that he had near-perfect vision (after having worn eyeglassessince age 2). Later, however, Darby discovered that he no longer spoke orunderstood French.
Least Competent Criminals
Recurring Themes: (1) The Broward County (Fla.) Sheriff's Office is looking for a man who robbedthe Citi Trends store in Oakland Park, Fla., in September and hasreleased a surveillance video of the suspect. The video shows the man removinghis mask, though he continues trying to shield his face using his hands, givingthe appearance of a man playing peek-a-boo, according to a WFOR-TV report. (2)David Perticone, 46, was arrested in Severn, Md., in August and charged withstealing about $25,000 worth of items from a woman's house just down the block.The woman discovered the items in Perticone's front yard as part of a yard salehe was conducting.
A News of the Weird Classic
In May 1998 at Beaver Brook Golf Course in Haydenville, Mass., ToddObuchowski was credited with a hole-in-one on a par-3 hole after his tee shotwent over the green and onto a highway, hit a passing Toyota driven by Nancy Bachand, ricochetedback to the green, and rolled into the cup. At least eight golfers witnessedthe shot.
© 2009 Chuck Shepherd
