Milwaukee Chamber Theatre Zooms Shakespeare

by

Scene I. Milwaukee. Piggly Wiggly Cart Return. The Present

Friend: Hey, did you see the Milwaukee Chamber Theatre’s ZOOM production of Romeo and Juliet?

Me: No, d’you?

Friend: Indeed I did.

Me: Well? How was it?

Friend: To be honest, ZOOM doesn’t exactly capture the Globe Theater. I mean, the premise is fine. It’s a plague after all and the last thing anyone wants to do is die from going to a crowded theater.

Me: Exactly. So?

Friend: The technical stuff was a little off. It’s ZOOM so all the actors are in their homes or some place. It’s like watching the TV news where everybody is broadcasting from their living rooms. The sound is a little off here, the camera creates a fish-eye effect there. I get it, it’s all rather new and it takes a bit of getting used to. And, the audience could type in comments, too. Annoyingly, they did. But Shakespeare is Shakespeare, so it came through. Plus, it was an updated version.

Me: Updated?

Friend: Right, updated. Apparently, there’s a company, Play On Shakespeare, that translates Shakespearean plays into updated ones. It’s a thing.

Me: Translated? Like into Spanish?

Friend: No, into English, silly.

Me: Aren’t Shakespeare’s plays are already in English?

Friend: Well, yes, but this is “now” English, not “then” English. Besides, “translation” sounds loftier than dumbing-down, I suppose. The mission is to enhance understanding and make plays like Romeo and Juliet accessible for students and such.

Me: Wouldn’t that be Westside Story?

Friend: Right. Well, no… well sort of, but without the music and choreography. And, actually, aside from some word changes in the dialogue, it’s still very Bardly played…you know, Laurence Olivier-like. So, when Mercutio, Tybalt and Romeo…

Me : They didn’t change the names? They don’t sound particularly accessible. I’ve never met a Mercutio nor a Tybalt. I know a Roman… that’s kind of close to Romeo.

Friend: Anyway… word changes…like in the fight scene with Mercutio, Tybalt and Romeo, Tybalt calls Romeo a faggot.

Me: Faggot??? Isn’t the original word “villain”? Why would Tybalt call Romeo a faggot?

Friend: I really don’t know. Maybe fudge-packer didn’t fit the iambic pentameter. But then Romeo replies he’s not a faggot. You have to admit, however jarring and gratuitous, it’s accessible. 

Me: Faggot??? Who says faggot these days? It cost Kobe Bryant $100k to say it a decade ago. So, they made Romeo and Juliet accessible to students by signaling it’s OK to call someone a faggot? Talk about a teaching moment! How many kids kill themselves after being bullied and called “faggots”? I’d hate to be the gay boy on the bus after that school trip to the theater, I can tell you that.

 I imagine there had to have been gay people in the cast. Didn’t anyone have the balls to object? Or did they just acquiesce because that’s what we do? Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez we’re not, that’s for sure.

Friend: Actually, at least four of the cast were gay.  Actors have to eat, I suppose.  Any script in a storm… And, I imagine the dramaturg didn’t want to change what was written.

Me: One wouldn’t want to rewrite a rewrite, would one? 

Friend: Well, obviously MCT must have known it would be controversial. They’re not stupid, I don’t think…although blithely tone-deaf or shamefully thoughtless, perhaps. Or is it thoughtlessly shameful? And, to be fair, the LGBTQ community really is one of the few remaining and perfectly acceptable targets as far as offensive and demeaning bullying is concerned. Just try dropping a fat joke—they’ll eat you alive!

Me: There’s nothing quite like the arrogant ignorance of straight privilege, is there? Or is it ignorant arrogance?

Friend: I know, right? In 2020, no less. Still, I can hardly wait for MCT’s next production of Othello.

(Exeunt)

To read more My LGBTQ POV columns by Paul Masterson, click here.