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Dog drinking water
Deeply attached to your pets? Find solace and enjoyment in hanging out with other animals—dogs, cats, horses, birds, etc.? Have a comfort animal in your life? Well, according to a recent study, this may be indicative of … you guessed it … a mental health problem. My profession is infamous for conjuring new syndromes requiring psychotherapy, sometimes for better and others for ill. While positive psychology, which looks at what’s healthy about us, has made a dent in this tendency, for every study conducted on upbeat and adaptive human attributes, there are many more devoted to psychopathology. As one of my cynical colleagues once wryly told an audience, “Your misery is our prosperity.”
That’s probably way over the top. Most psychotherapists are good eggs trying to bring some positivity to the world, not just turn a buck. What’s more, there is a long history of society ignoring or minimizing serious mental health issues, to the detriment of all. However, as a biased pet owner who observes the benefits of these companions in the lives of my clients as well as my own, I question the underlying premises in this newly emerging “problem.” So, what does the study assert?
Well, in fairness, the authors acknowledge many of the proven benefits of living with pets and having companion animals. These are well documented. From a psychological standpoint, having a pet provides social support and comfort, lowers stress hormones in the body, elevates mood, eases the suffering associated with PTSD, and reduces feelings of loneliness and depression. Children with companion animals exhibit greater self-esteem, more empathy and improved socialization. What’s more, social interaction between humans proves more positive when a pet is present, particularly a dog. On the medical side, companion animals lower our blood pressure, improve cardiovascular health overall, support greater longevity and provide comfort to families dealing with dementia.
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Insecure Human Attachment?
Nonetheless, the study asks, “Is our emotional attachment to companion animals a compensatory response to insecure human attachment?” The authors go on to assert, “Specifically, individuals who developed insecure attachment styles in early childhood have stronger emotional attachments to their pets than individuals in their life and may also struggle with loneliness and depression.” The implied message? It’s healthier to have strong emotional attachments to humans than to other animals. Excuse me? Where in this world might one turn for some measure of unconditional positive regard when, as is too often the case, it doesn’t come from Homo sapiens? And why does relying on pets for companionship and interpersonal positivity constitute settling for less, let alone serve as a warning sign of underlying psychological dysfunction?
Over one hundred million of us own dogs or cats, and millions more have birds, fish, small mammals and horses. Why? Because, intuitively, we feel the positive impacts of these relationships and sense, albeit often subconsciously, their importance to our overall well-being. During my years in practice, I’ve worked with countless clients who have benefited significantly from the human-pet connection. Many expressed greater trust in the emotional safety and support coming from their companion animals than that available from other humans in their lives. While the authors of this study may speculate that turning to pets rather than other persons to meet certain emotional needs constitutes a compensatory strategy (“I prefer humans but will settle for pets”), I see it as a positive adaptation with few, if any downsides.
As one client put it, “When it comes to my cats, I don’t worry about being betrayed, lied to, abused or made to feel bad about myself.” This individual acknowledged experiencing so-called “attachment issues” with humans, which the research in question focused on, but didn’t sequester herself from other people or cower from social interaction. What she did embrace was what she called a “safe emotional home” provided by her pets.
Collectively, if we humans were more trustworthy, forgiving and loving to one another, we might not need to turn to companion animals to meet our emotional needs. But, for many, there is wisdom in French novelist Colette’s assertion that, “Our perfect companions never have fewer than four feet.”
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